Well, the girl's moved out at last, thank god. Means I can actually get the place clean and it will stay clean. Girls believe hiding things equates to hygiene and prefer the self-righteousness of periodic cleaning frenzies/theatrics to the relative sanity of simply not spreading crap everywhere in the first place. Breadcrumbs in bed, anyone?
But the BIG benefit, of course, is that I won't need to keep buying toilet paper every 10 minutes.
Christ, do girls get through toilet paper.
I reckon they EAT it.
That's right: girls eat toilet paper.
That's why a month's supply never lasts a day. They eat it. Lock the bathroom door then sit down and scarf it by the secret handful, great fistfuls of paper rammed into their diet-starved maws when they think no one can see them.
Girls all complain about their weight too.
Anyone else see a pattern here?
The reason you're fat, girls? Toilet paper. You're eating too much toilet paper.
If you want to lose weight, girls, here's a tip:
Stop eating the toilet paper.
Alternatively, just switch to the 98%-fat-free stuff and watch the pounds melt away. It might not taste as nice, but, hell, you're the one eating toilet paper: what the hell would you know about taste?
Toilet Paper Lite. You know it makes sense.
Posted by
syl, 5 years ago:
Damn it, Sal. I thought one-ply was Lite and three-ply was high-fat.
Bit of a generalisation about the cleaning, Sal, but I think you're spot on about the bog paper. I really don't know how they manage to get through so much.
PS We knew nothing of this girl of whom you speak. I think there's a saga there, but maybe it's best if we don't know. But you tanatlise us with this glimpse into your domestic arrangements. One can't help but speculate about your knowledge of crumbs in the bed.
Thing is though, joking aside, eating loo roll is quite common among anorexics :/
Posted by
syl, 5 years ago:
Lord. Must be great when the stuff comes out the other end. :S
I think we use more because of our monthlies, *ahem* you know. *blushes*
Anorexics must have self-wiping bums.
The monthlies don't explain the fairly uniform use of tons of the stuff all month round. Maybe women are secret bum wiping fetishists.
Posted by
syl, 5 years ago:
We like our bums to be clean! No wonder you blokes pong - use more loo roll! :)
Do you guys WASH YOUR BUM IN THE SHOWER?
*wags finger*
I don't like the way this thread is headed.
Posted by
syl, 5 years ago:
Haha, also, if you don't use enough paper you get poo and wee on your hand. Anyone for cookies? Freshly baked.
A bit of dirt never hurt no one. Kids today aren't allowed to play with poo. That's why they're so suceptible to every little bug.
Posted by
su, 5 years ago:
maybe it's not girls, but whether or not they are a scruncher or a folder
*sticks fingers in ears and goes 'LA, LA, LA, LAAAAAAAAAA......'*
I'll tell you why we get through the bog roll: PERIODS! There's a whole lotta blood that needs wiping away each time you go to the loo.
Posted by
syl, 5 years ago:
That's what I said sweetie, albeit slightly more genteelly.
Yeah but I couldn't be bothered with genteel and stupidly I didn't read the rest of the posts first.
those 30-day periods must really get you down after a while
Girls have to wipe both areas where boys have to just shake one and wipe the other.
Posted by
syl, 5 years ago:
That is a very good point,Reddy. I bet that when they only have a wee, they don't even bother with loo roll and just shake it. POOH! You boys are revolting! ;)
On a scale of 1 to petty, how close is this to leaving the seat up?
Posted by
Sul, 5 years ago:
Let me take that threadjack a little further. What part is the seat? I feel it's the bit that you sit on. Hence the name. I'm berated, however, for leaving the part I consider the lid up also. But it falls under the same annoyance as leaving the seat up, something I have mastered not to do.
Back on topic, you ladies do use far too much but I'd rather that than you drip-drying.
Posted by
syl, 5 years ago:
No, not the lid, the seat. I don't care if it's left up, honestly, how hard is it to put it back down? BUT NOT WIPING YOUR WILLY? NO BOYS!
I think generally, it doesn't seem necessary. I guess it depends how your (little bit of) wee comes out.
Posted by
Miki, 5 years ago:
I don't get why girls are supposed to care about guys leaving the seat up.
My thinking is, if I find it up I put it down, if he finds it down he lifts it up. Can someone please explain why i should be indignant about it?
Of course I have wandered in absent mindedly and sat down on the thing with the seat still up, yes its a eh ... surprise, but hardly something to get upset about and it's down to me not paying attention.
Posted by
Miki, 5 years ago:
As for the toilet paper sheeesh I do all the shopping anyway and if you want me to pay for it from my own allowance, fine.
Skimping on toilet paper is harsh :P
I don't like touching the toilet seat so I like it left down.
Posted by
friday, 5 years ago:
YOU HAVE GOT IT ALL WRONG!
Girls dont use all the toilet paper, you just buy the cheap rolls so it appears that its going faster than you thought, leading you to believe that girls are eating it.
THAT'S RIGHT - DO YOU HEAR ME? CHEAP TOILET PAPER BUYER!
LOVE YOUR BUM! BUY THE LUXURY ROLL! PROBLEM SOLVED!
Posted by
che, 5 years ago:
HATE THE PLANET! BUY THE LUXURY ROLL!
Girls have to wipe both areas where boys have to just shake one and wipe the other.
not even that!
some people think sul's dancing. not so. he is at the forefront of toilet technology.
you've heard about the paper-less office, well welcome to the paper-less toilet. and girls, watch the pounds melt away as you replace lazy wiping with vim-filled activity! let your get-up-and-go let you go-and-get-up (get-on-up)
reminds me of that great
band:
"not dancing, wiping"
Posted by
che, 5 years ago:
oh no!
10 points to Miki for injecting some sense into the debate.
Posted by
che, 5 years ago:
minus 10 points for Salty for injecting some of Sul's naked dancing arse into the debate. :(
Posted by
cal, 5 years ago:
wow, not seen that for aaaages
it's not something i do often
Posted by
Gary, 5 years ago:
wow, not seen that for aaaages
Same. I remember it, but I haven't seen it again until now. Shocking. Just shocking. :/
Posted by
syl, 5 years ago:
Not from me ;)
Posted by
Miki, 5 years ago:
not from me either :D
so clean, so dry, so environmentally friendly.
now 6 times as good.
Posted by
su, 5 years ago:
i temporarily went blind
From all the masturbating?
Posted by
syl, 5 years ago:
Well it's a sexy bum.
Pity he looks like a mong from the front.
Posted by
syl, 5 years ago:
He does not! You loon!
Someone cheer me up please I'm feeling a bit down. (post Rugby win slump)
Posted by
Gary, 5 years ago:
Don't worry, Syl. I'll cheer you up on MSN when I get home. :)
Posted by
che, 5 years ago:
O_o
Posted by
syl, 5 years ago:
YAY!!! Thanks Gary!
This thread is so so wrong
Are you using synthetic or natural cotton?
Posted by
syl, 5 years ago:
I am all natural, baby.
Posted by
syl, 5 years ago:
Ooh. I sound like a 57 year-old pervert called Merv.
Posted by
che, 5 years ago:
better than sounding like a 30-something-old pervert called Syl.
;)
Posted by
syl, 5 years ago:
I'm 38. Do you get female perverts?
Posted by
che, 5 years ago:
Well you get female child molesters. So I assume they feature under the blanket term "perverts".
Posted by
syl, 5 years ago:
I only molest sexy men. Does that count?
/hopes so
Dancing ass!
Perversion is a term and concept describing those types of human behavior that are perceived to be a serious deviation from what is considered to be orthodox or normal. Although it can refer to varying forms of deviation, it is most often used to decsribe sexual behaviors that are seen as abnormal or excessive. Perversion differs from deviant behavior, since the latter refers to a recognized violation of social rules or norms (although the two terms can apply to the same thing). It is often considered derogatory and in psychological literature the term paraphilia is now used instead[1], though this term is controversial.
The concept of perversion is somewhat subjective[1], and its application varies depending on culture. As a psychological term it was originally applied especially frequently to homosexual behavior.[2] However, homosexuality is no longer treated as a disorder in mainstream psychiatry (see Homosexuality and psychology).
In fact there are more gays than plumbers. So, who's more perverted, anyway? Guys digging in other peoples feces and wastes, or guys simply loving guys?