Discussion » Hi All I Am New

This is a read-only copy. The forum ran on iamcal.com from 2000 until its database was lost in 2016, and this topic was rebuilt from copies saved by the Internet Archive's Wayback Machine. Some replies may be missing.
Posted by Redman, 10:22, 12th March 2003:
 
Hello all I am a new person.

Just a little about me:
I am a professional footballer, but I wont be telling you my real name for obvious reasons.
I am in the 21-25 age group.
I have been reading posts on here for a little while before I actually decided to log on myself and I like the way people just say whatever is on there minds....very cool.

Just thought id introduce myself to you all.
Posted by RUSS, 10:25, 12th March 2003:
 
do you play for a good team?
i.e premiership?
Posted by RUSS, 10:26, 12th March 2003:
 
sorry, got a bit excited...

Hi, nice to meet you
Posted by beargod, 10:27, 12th March 2003:
 
hello and how are we?

I thought it was Redmaiden When I first looked at it.
Posted by Redman, 10:28, 12th March 2003:
 
Hi Russ, yes I play for a good team although not everyone would agree I spose!
Nice to meet you too!
Posted by Victor Menendez, 10:28, 12th March 2003:
 
Welcome redman!

(as long as your not Robbie Savage)
Posted by RUSS, 10:28, 12th March 2003:
 
yeah you've nearly got a namesake
Posted by Redman, 10:31, 12th March 2003:
 
I am NOT Savage.....why do you think I am called Redman??
Posted by Victor Menendez, 10:34, 12th March 2003:
 
Your not Gary Neville are you?

If so, you owe me for that pint you spilled on me in the barton arms
Posted by Redman, 10:35, 12th March 2003:
 
Oh and before someone tries to get my e-mail off of the system, you wont have any luck. My club makes all of us aware that if we are going to use the internet to visit random sites we should all use false names and e-mail addresses we do not intend on using for personal or business use.
Thankfully my club set me up with e-mails and other stuff so I can have some sort of a private life when at home.
Just thought Id tell you how it works.
Posted by Redman, 10:35, 12th March 2003:
 
Nope not Gary Neville, in fact I dont really get on with him.
Posted by Victor Menendez, 10:37, 12th March 2003:
 
Ah, i once heard that 'Gary Neville is a red, he hates scousers' i deduce that you are John Arne Rise!
Posted by RUSS, 10:38, 12th March 2003:
 
mr beckaham?

is that why he was your best man as a cover up to pretend it was all sweet and happy at man u
Posted by Redman, 10:41, 12th March 2003:
 
ha ha I can see that this is going to turn into a guessing game.
Victor you are close, but you know I am not going to tell you who i am even if you DO guess it.
Id get too much sh*te, and I really would like to stay as a neutral with you guys.
Posted by beargod, 10:42, 12th March 2003:
 
There are too many teams that play in red, even in the premiership and many players in those teams,

Being red might mean he even plays for the Welsh national team
Posted by chandler, 10:43, 12th March 2003:
 
Hi Josh, oh i mean Redman. Yes Redman, not Josh, Redman. Silly mistake
Posted by RUSS, 10:43, 12th March 2003:
 
it's cool with me



congrats on the frank worthington
Posted by Redman, 10:43, 12th March 2003:
 
beargod, I like your thinking....I could be anyone!!!
Posted by beargod, 10:45, 12th March 2003:
 
are you in England? Scotland? Wales? Some weird foriegn country?
Posted by Victor Menendez, 10:46, 12th March 2003:
 
Schoolboy error there chay
Posted by Redman, 10:48, 12th March 2003:
 
Im in England, but lets quit the guessing lad. I cant tell you who I am, seriously....I could get in shite from the gaffer if he found out. He would probably be cool but its not worth the hassle!
Posted by RUSS, 10:51, 12th March 2003:
 
you must kind of want us to know or somrthing otherwise you wouldn't have said "hi i am footballer"
Posted by chandler, 10:51, 12th March 2003:
 
Enough of this Joshing around.
Posted by Victor Menendez, 10:52, 12th March 2003:
 
Welcome then, but be warned, there's some tosser who goes by the name of Josh Wank who comes on the site occasionally, intelligence suggests that he is some immature school kid who tries to wind people up. keep an eye out for him, i don't think we have seen the last of him.

oops etc.
Posted by Redman, 10:55, 12th March 2003:
 
I wanted you to know I was a footballer just so everyone knows my proffession. Looking back I think I should have kept it to myself because of the hassle.

Chandler, I am not messing about, I would prefer that the subject was changed now.
You know the score right ;-)
Posted by Foghorn Leghorn, 10:57, 12th March 2003:
 
Chay, you are so suspicious! (so am i)

Welcome Redman, I wont even try to guess..basically becuase if you say Vic is close then i dont want to know. Not yet anyway, maybe after Thursday. If you are who you claim to be then you will know what i mean by that.
Posted by Victor Menendez, 10:57, 12th March 2003:
 
Yeah chay ;-)
Posted by RedAndWhiteMan, 11:03, 12th March 2003:
 
Hi, im RedAndWhiteMan and i am in no way,shape or form an old member with a new name.
Posted by Redman, 11:05, 12th March 2003:
 
Foghorn: Yeah your boys will be a good match but obviously we think we can turn them over at Parkhead.
Good luck to them though!
Posted by chandler, 11:05, 12th March 2003:
 
well thats told me Josh
Posted by beargod, 11:06, 12th March 2003:
 
erm, Yes
Posted by chandler, 11:06, 12th March 2003:
 
hahaaha nice one Vicky
Posted by RUSS, 11:06, 12th March 2003:
 
hi red and white man nice to meet you

;o)
Posted by Victor Menendez, 11:06, 12th March 2003:
 
Eh, what did i do chay?
Posted by chandler, 11:07, 12th March 2003:
 
:)
Posted by RedAndWhiteMan, 11:08, 12th March 2003:
 
Hi RUSS nice to meet you. not so keen on that Victor Menendez though, he seems a bit too intelligent, strong, rich, handsome and talented for my liking.
Posted by Redman, 11:08, 12th March 2003:
 
Anyway people, I really have to go.

Sorry Victor and Chandler, you have lost me.
Posted by beargod, 11:09, 12th March 2003:
 
I thought that was the team redman was in
Posted by Victor Menendez, 11:09, 12th March 2003:
 
Thanks a lot RedAndWhiteMan, thats very complimentary, im quite likable when you get to know me though.
Posted by chandler, 11:11, 12th March 2003:
 
first sign of madness Vic :)
Posted by RedAndWhiteMan, 11:11, 12th March 2003:
 
Thats ok Victor, i'll see how it goes. Whats the story with that JoshRedmanWank?
Posted by Victor Menendez, 11:13, 12th March 2003:
 
Dunno, he keeps banging on about how he doesn't like us and doesn't like the site but he keeps on coming back like a bent stick.
Posted by RUSS, 11:14, 12th March 2003:
 
now this has gone real wonky!!
i have a feeling it's not josh
Posted by RedAndWhiteMan, 11:15, 12th March 2003:
 
Fair enough Vic, i've got to go now, i am still intimidated by your brilliance but i'll learn to deal with it. Ill be back people.

(Got to go and win the Cricket world cup final in a couple of days)
Posted by beargod, 11:16, 12th March 2003:
 
RUSS: I don't
Posted by chandler, 11:16, 12th March 2003:
 
RUSS I am sooooo certain it is Josh. as in 100%.
Posted by Victor Menendez, 11:17, 12th March 2003:
 
What a nice man that Redandwhiteman is eh?

Where did our, Ahem *footballer* go?
Posted by Foghorn Leghorn, 11:19, 12th March 2003:
 
ah, so can you see the IP then Chay?
Posted by chandler, 11:20, 12th March 2003:
 
lets just say the passwords are remarkably similar. hell,lets just say they are the same.
Posted by beargod, 11:21, 12th March 2003:
 
and just like that a poof apeared
Posted by RUSS, 11:22, 12th March 2003:
 
how do you know he is a poof?
Posted by beargod, 11:25, 12th March 2003:
 
I never said he was, I never said It was directed at anybody
Posted by RUSS, 11:26, 12th March 2003:
 
it was a joke.....
Posted by Victor Menendez, 11:27, 12th March 2003:
 
I don't think it can be classed as a joke when you have to follow it with the words 'it was a joke'

Lets talk more about redandwhiteman!
Posted by beargod, 11:27, 12th March 2003:
 
as is my brain
Posted by beargod, 11:28, 12th March 2003:
 
Redandwhiteman seems to rock especially with his cricket and godlike prouess
Posted by Foghorn Leghorn, 11:28, 12th March 2003:
 
yeah lets..he's a bit of a wimp dont you think?
Posted by plindoe, 11:29, 12th March 2003:
 
Well done Sherlocks!

Oh by the way I am really an online international porndistributing billionaire, but chose to keep it quiet... until now!

What a turd, will he not disappear!
Posted by Foghorn Leghorn, 11:30, 12th March 2003:
 
I am actually Tiger Woods! ;o)
Posted by plindoe, 11:31, 12th March 2003:
 
ps redandwhiteman seems too cool to be true :)
Posted by beargod, 11:31, 12th March 2003:
 
well can I have everyones autograph?
Posted by Redman, 11:32, 12th March 2003:
 
Ok Ok you got me! I was Josh Wank....but I AM a footballer, just that things got off on the wrong foot and I thought it best to start off again and make it clear what i was.
Posted by plindoe, 11:32, 12th March 2003:
 
you could have mine but I have masterbated so much much my hands cannot grip anything smaller than 4" in width :)
Posted by chandler, 11:33, 12th March 2003:
 
Redman just give it a bloody rest. you're doing our collective head in.
Posted by Redman, 11:34, 12th March 2003:
 
lol sorry girls and boys but it had to be done.....at least you know now though hey!
Posted by plindoe, 11:34, 12th March 2003:
 
What, that your a turd who annoys everyone. You didnt have to go very far for people to work that out.
Posted by Redman, 11:36, 12th March 2003:
 
shut it you knob!
Posted by toughseedstakeroot, 11:37, 12th March 2003:
 
hi iam new...
*burp*
must be the vermouth repeating. soccer trainings not till 12...
time for one more..
Posted by plindoe, 11:38, 12th March 2003:
 
Please dont taunt me with such hurtful remarks!
Posted by Redman, 11:39, 12th March 2003:
 
Training is at 8.30am actually and I am off to get my coach soon...for your information!
Posted by plindoe, 11:40, 12th March 2003:
 
But it is 11.40 you knob, dont you think you are late?
Posted by Foghorn Leghorn, 11:40, 12th March 2003:
 
Josh or Redman or knob, which ever it is...go and play with the traffic. I am a very chilled person but you are getting right on my tits now.
Posted by toughseedstakeroot, 11:41, 12th March 2003:
 
long coach off a short motorway?
Posted by RedAndWhiteMan, 11:41, 12th March 2003:
 
TREMBLE IN FEAR MORTALS, I AM REDANDWHITEMAN, I AM YOUR GOD NOW!
Posted by chandler, 11:42, 12th March 2003:
 
just ignore him till he gets bored and goes back to playing kiss chase in the playground with all the other boys
Posted by Redman, 11:42, 12th March 2003:
 
Like I am bothered....plindoe I know the time thanks. We didnt train today due to a forthcoming game.

Look I am bored and gotta go...BYEE
Posted by RedAndWhiteMan, 11:42, 12th March 2003:
 
This redjosh'footballer'wankman idiot is boring me, lets talk about how all the ladies wanna be with vic!
Posted by plindoe, 11:43, 12th March 2003:
 
yeah!

Is it true Vic has the largest cock ever?
Posted by Redman, 11:43, 12th March 2003:
 
May I just say before I leave that you lot are proper geeks!

Laters!
Posted by Victor Menendez, 11:43, 12th March 2003:
 
Gee, thanks RedAndWhiteMan, your making me blush.
Posted by chandler, 11:44, 12th March 2003:
 
plindoe - Cal says that he doesnt.
Posted by plindoe, 11:44, 12th March 2003:
 
login
logout
login
logout
login
logout
login
logout

Time consuming eh buddy!
Posted by November Eclectica, 11:45, 12th March 2003:
 
I'm confused.
Posted by beargod, 11:46, 12th March 2003:
 
There does seem to be a lot of grudge against him. I believe in second chances but then again I havn't been a member as long as him so I don't know what he was like then.
Posted by Victor Menendez, 11:46, 12th March 2003:
 
Don't worry dear, just trust in what Redandwhiteman says.
Posted by plindoe, 11:47, 12th March 2003:
 
Redandwhiteman for World Leader!
Posted by toughseedstakeroot, 11:48, 12th March 2003:
 
makes me think of measles..
but hey
Posted by beargod, 11:48, 12th March 2003:
 
Redandwhiteman, is he like invincible?
Posted by plindoe, 11:50, 12th March 2003:
 
Yeah!

He is like so cool!
Posted by Victor Menendez, 11:52, 12th March 2003:
 
He does appear to be a fine gentleman, and trustworthy too.
Posted by plindoe, 11:56, 12th March 2003:
 
Its like superman though Vic. You never seem to be around when the legend is here!
Posted by Victor Menendez, 12:06, 12th March 2003:
 
Ah, i've not had so much fun since my colostomy bag burst in the swimming baths!
Posted by toughseedstakeroot, 12:07, 12th March 2003:
 
what was that saying about appearances and deceiving...
Posted by toughseedstakeroot, 12:08, 12th March 2003:
 
yeah... but the piece'd'resistance (viva!la!wha!) was when you put it on your head like you do those panties...
;P
Posted by Victor Menendez, 12:09, 12th March 2003:
 
No, your thinking of 'don't look a gift horse in the mouth while your counting its teeth'

or something like that.
Posted by toughseedstakeroot, 12:10, 12th March 2003:
 
ah..my mistake.
got a phrase book for xmas and it said if appearances are deceiving ease up on the hard drugs...
just thought it might apply.
Posted by Grim..., 12:19, 12th March 2003:
 
Lo Redman.

Can you tell us what position you play in?
Posted by toughseedstakeroot, 12:19, 12th March 2003:
 
apparantly he's gone training....
though i wouldnt believe everything you read.
Posted by Foghorn Leghorn, 12:22, 12th March 2003:
 
he plays Left back Grim.
Posted by Victor Menendez, 12:24, 12th March 2003:
 
Give him a break, he's going to play celtic tomorrow.

I'm just off to fertilize the lawn.
Posted by toughseedstakeroot, 12:25, 12th March 2003:
 
ive heard putting holes in helps as well!!!
Posted by Grim..., 12:29, 12th March 2003:
 
Yeah, left back in the changing room.

*BOOM BOOM*
Posted by Victor Menendez, 12:30, 12th March 2003:
 
and the award for 'most random comment of the day' goes to toughseedstakeroot.

Congratulations!
Posted by toughseedstakeroot, 12:33, 12th March 2003:
 
ill ignore that victor.
just cause you cant grasp the tenous connection doesnt mean it wasnt there!
Posted by Victor Menendez, 12:35, 12th March 2003:
 
:)
Posted by Rosie, 12:43, 12th March 2003:
 
Is that Josh Wank about again? That bloke is a pain. Is josh pretending to be a footballer now?
Posted by chandler, 12:45, 12th March 2003:
 
yes rosie.
Posted by Rosie, 12:46, 12th March 2003:
 
Oh Dear!

Just when I thought it was safe.....

;)
Posted by Foghorn Leghorn, 12:47, 12th March 2003:
 
He is pretending to be an adult.
Posted by RedAndWhiteMan, 12:48, 12th March 2003:
 
Hello Rosie, i am redandwhite man, i am an admirer of you and your fine sisters!
Posted by beargod, 12:49, 12th March 2003:
 
Redandwhiteman is also perfect in every way
Posted by Rosie, 12:50, 12th March 2003:
 
Right - I'm confused. who is redandwhite man - is it Sul or Vic?
Posted by Foghorn Leghorn, 12:50, 12th March 2003:
 
Vic!
Posted by Victor Menendez, 12:51, 12th March 2003:
 
Not me baby, im right here.
Posted by Rosie, 12:51, 12th March 2003:
 
LOL!

This is getting a bit complicated!
:/
Posted by toughseedstakeroot, 12:52, 12th March 2003:
 
login/logout....plindoe and i know your dastardly game vic
;)
Posted by plindoe, 13:08, 12th March 2003:
 
The TURD Healey is off on a gentlemans afternoon, dont know what the fuck he is on it for thou!



Oooops, forgot to praise the mighty Redandwhiteman!

Hail Lord Redandwhiteman!
Long may you rule!
Posted by Victor Menendez, 13:22, 12th March 2003:
 
that redandwhiteman rocks!
Posted by Whiteandredman, 13:58, 12th March 2003:
 
I heard a rumour that my evil cousin was poluting these pages with boring rantings. So I have finally tracked you down scum bucket!

Just wait till your mum finds out what you have been doing!
Posted by chandler, 13:59, 12th March 2003:
 
that would be your aunt right?
Posted by chandler_dot, 14:02, 12th March 2003:
 
Sorry, don't listen to me, i'm not making any sense today.
Posted by Josh Wank, 14:03, 12th March 2003:
 
I cant believe that you have never heard "Bangers" before!

Thats one of me faves!!!
Posted by plindoe, 14:05, 12th March 2003:
 
Unlike you, whom is the fav of no-one!
Posted by Josh Wank, 14:06, 12th March 2003:
 
lol yeah but thats the way its meant to be.....everybody needs somebody to loathe!

You know it makes sense!
Posted by Grim..., 14:17, 12th March 2003:
 
What doesn't make sense is that you're discussing it in the wrong topic.
You about as much a footballer as you are out of puberty.
Stupid little monkey.
Posted by plindoe, 14:20, 12th March 2003:
 
:)
Posted by Josh Wank, 14:20, 12th March 2003:
 
I do play football, and I am well out of puberty silly boy!

You just cant take the banter matey, so that makes you less of a man! Just face it your not happy that your bird gets her tits out for the lads!
Posted by chandler, 14:23, 12th March 2003:
 
time to take the hint and get lost Mr Wank. It's all fun and games until someone loses an eye
Posted by Josh Wank, 14:25, 12th March 2003:
 
Wheres the humour round here??
Blimey a man comes on here bored out of his brains and tries to liven the place up and then all of a sudden a few people get a cob on.......I dunno kids these days!
Posted by plindoe, 14:30, 12th March 2003:
 
Piece of advise

'FUCK OFF!'
Posted by Josh Wank, 14:31, 12th March 2003:
 
da dee da da da
Posted by chandler, 14:31, 12th March 2003:
 
i think maybe it is the fact that your attempts to "liven the place up" are unappreciated, seeing as we were all having a jolly good time before you felt compelled to entertain us with your own "special" brand of humour.
Posted by Josh Wank, 14:32, 12th March 2003:
 
Job done it seems!!
Posted by Victor Menendez, 14:36, 12th March 2003:
 
To be fair, if we didn't have Joshredmanwank then we wouldn't have met the fine man of mystery who calls himself 'RedAndWhiteMan'
Posted by chandler, 14:38, 12th March 2003:
 
thats very true. well done Mr Wank
Posted by beargod, 14:41, 12th March 2003:
 
we need redandwhite man now, never take him away he is our oxygen
Posted by Josh Wank, 14:41, 12th March 2003:
 
Well there you go.....look Ill come clean now.....I only said most of what I said just said to wind people up and to be fair it worked.
But alot of what I say I do actually believe, I just say it in a rather frank way, and sometimes that really gets peoples backs up but hey thats just the way I am.

Just thought I would try and put the real me across, basically I am just a wind up and wanted to get a few of you going.

PEACE!
Posted by RedAndWhiteMan, 14:44, 12th March 2003:
 
TREMBLE MORTALS, I AM RETURNED!

my spies in the iamcal camp (not vic) tell me i am needed, how may i be of assistance.
Posted by Whiteandredman, 14:45, 12th March 2003:
 
Redandwhiteman has been sent to his bedroom by his mum and if he behaves he will be allowed out at the weekend.
Posted by plindoe, 14:46, 12th March 2003:
 
Where has Vic gone now?
Posted by toughseedstakeroot, 14:46, 12th March 2003:
 
can you do that jig?
with the panties?
and the bear?
or is the bear a step too far?
(btw you only have to answer once yes/no) ;)
Posted by RedAndWhiteMan, 14:47, 12th March 2003:
 
I have no idea, maybe he is working.

unlike you, you workshy fop.

RedAndWhiteMum has no control over my superpowers.
Posted by Whiteandredman, 14:49, 12th March 2003:
 
Thats not what you were saying when she was looking after your grazed knee last weekend when you fell of your tri-cycle!
Posted by beargod, 14:49, 12th March 2003:
 
Josh I think that "winding up" has made you great enemies upon the Iamcal Crew, most vigilant is redandwhiteman
Posted by Josh Wank, 14:49, 12th March 2003:
 
lol oh well, like I said shit happens!
Posted by plindoe, 14:50, 12th March 2003:
 
...and you dont wanna piss him off, forget what Whiteandredman is saying, redandwhiteman is well wicked and awesome
Posted by RedAndWhiteMan, 14:51, 12th March 2003:
 
REDANDWHITEMAN rides no tri-cycles, REDANDWHITEMAN travels by super-space hopper and if you have no need for me to battle my arch-nemesis REDMAN then i shall take my crimefighting powers elsewere.

Later mortals.
Posted by Victor Menendez, 14:52, 12th March 2003:
 
Hey im back peeps, whats occuring?
Posted by chandler, 14:53, 12th March 2003:
 
Josh - maybe your sign in name should have been Wind Up Merchant. then we would have "got it"
Posted by plindoe, 14:54, 12th March 2003:
 
major shit is going down mate!

RedAndWhiteMan might not help us fight the wanker that is Josh!

Whiteandredman is telling RedAndWhiteMan's Mum, what mischief he is getting upto and is going to ground him. Damn you Vic you always disapear when trouble happens!
Posted by Josh Wank, 14:54, 12th March 2003:
 
Well its all done and dusted now isnt it!
Posted by beargod, 14:55, 12th March 2003:
 
Vic you missed the magnificent redandwhiteman again, i wonder who he really is
Posted by Victor Menendez, 14:57, 12th March 2003:
 
We can only wonder i suppose.
Posted by toughseedstakeroot, 15:18, 12th March 2003:
 
wow.
that post went down like a lead balloon.
hey victor!
Posted by plindoe, 15:18, 12th March 2003:
 
perhaps everyone is trying to work out who the hero is?
Posted by toughseedstakeroot, 15:25, 12th March 2003:
 
nah.dont be silly;)
people just get confused with whose red whose white and which goes first!
Posted by chris, 15:58, 12th March 2003:
 
....ever had that feeling you have just slept through one fucked up day?
Posted by chandler, 15:58, 12th March 2003:
 
hahahahaa yes
Posted by chris, 16:02, 12th March 2003:
 
good :) i felt a bit queezy trying to read all that...
Posted by Victor Menendez, 13:28, 2nd October 2003:
 
*Bump* these were the days eh?
Posted by arsepuppy, 13:33, 2nd October 2003:
 
You sick bastard Vic.
Posted by Victor Menendez, 13:42, 2nd October 2003:
 
?
Posted by arsepuppy, 13:47, 2nd October 2003:
 
Bringing this 'un back :)

Bloody JoshRedTitWank....
Posted by arsepuppy, 14:04, 2nd October 2003:
 
Is it completely dead here or has the uni network gone up the spout??
Posted by Sul, 14:13, 2nd October 2003:
 
Its been really dead for the last few days. I wonder why?
Posted by arsepuppy, 14:14, 2nd October 2003:
 
My mighty thread-killing powers :/
Posted by arsepuppy, 14:14, 2nd October 2003:
 
or people-pissing-off powers :(
Posted by Sul, 14:17, 2nd October 2003:
 
Its a possibility I suppose
Posted by Miki, 14:36, 2nd October 2003:
 
I'm translating a bloody boring badly written book for work (dutch -> english)

that was fun to read cos it all happened before I got here and it took me away from translating for a bit
Posted by friday, 15:55, 2nd October 2003:
 
"RedAndWhiteMan, 11:08 12 March 2003 :
Hi RUSS nice to meet you. not so keen on that Victor Menendez though, he seems a bit too intelligent, strong, rich, handsome and talented for my liking."

hahahahahahahahahahahaha ha
Posted by Redmaiden, 18:12, 2nd October 2003:
 
there's too many bloody red people round here, I'm getting confused too :-D