Posted by
cal, 07:52, 18th March 2003:
From the
wigu mailing list:
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I like to go see concerts. Lately I have taken to seeing them all by
myself, because I get to come and go as I please. Most of all, I like
the feel of my car when I leave the show and my ear-drums are half-deaf
and ringing from the loud guitar and drum noises. My little car
usually makes some horrible racket when it is going down I-40 at
four-o-clock in the morning. But not after some good old loud music.
Now I know what you are thinking. Jeff, why don't you just stand in
front of a jet engine for half an hour, and drive your car. Well,
there are several reasons for this. One, is that airplane runways are
surprisingly inaccessible for the common citizen. Two, is that even if
I did have access to a runway, odds are they wouldn't serve beer, have
flashy lights, or have cute girls bouncing around all over the place.
Well, actually, runways do have flashy lights, but this is irreleveant
due to their inaccessible nature.
The next question on your mind is obviously, "well what bands do you
like to go see and hear"? What is your musical preferences for hearing
in your ears? We like to have something in common, so here are some
bands I have seen lately, and a little review of each band.
Alisdair Polio and the Filet Mignoners -- this band is best described
as a mix of 1820s era patriotic washboard-n-bass and late 1996-era
tambourine. Alisdair Polio managed to rhyme "Judaism" with
"hypothesis", which I still cannot figure out. This band went to #92
on the Rwandan charts. When I offered a "high five" to Alisdair after
the show, he punched me square in the jaw, harder than I have ever been
struck by anything in my whole life.
Agorophobia Gail -- i like this one-woman band because the album is 74
minutes of total silence. When Agorophobia Gail came on stage, she
sat with her back to the crowd for two hours, without speaking a word.
When she show was over, she looked at the crowd with contempt, punched
the air and left, pulling her eyebrows. It was the most beautiful
thing I have ever seen.
Swollen Nuclear Recycle Bin -- this latest band (all members conceived
on Carnival Cruise ships) is the latest blend of
emo-punk-ska-hardcore-contemporary-alt-punk-weezer-core. I love this
band a lot. I mean seriously, with song titles such as "My Dog Has
Herpes and So Does My Ex-Girlfriend", "The Vacant Lot of My Loins
(cauliflower ear)", "I Know Who Shot Robert Blake's Old Lady", and "The
Old Eskimo Takes a Dope Train to Confusion (He has Never Seen TV)", how
can you go wrong??
Lots of ways, friend. There are lots of ways you can go wrong.
love
jeffR