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• Hello!

Right. Yesterday I left my moby at home with the b/f. I called him in the afternoon and he answered it by saying,"Don't call me on this number - i've already told you this isn't my phone". When I asked him what the hell he was talking about he said he was joking. I thought this was strange. His moby is broken - but he still has his chip with credit on it.

This morning I've looked at my call list (received calls/anwsered calls, etc.) and they have been erased.

What do you think? Is he cheating on me?

* he also ran me a bath last night which was ready when I got in from work and was being overly nice to me. Which was strange aswell.

Please tell me what you think. Am I being a paranoid fuckwit?

I'd say be paranoid but don't act on it till you have more evidence to go on. It could just be a genuine mistake that looks guilty as hell, or someone could be harassing him and he wants to protect you from it. Just keep an eye on him if i were you but don't start acting odd or it'll breed problems...

Should I ask him if he put his chip into my phone? Shall I ask him if he erased my call lists?

I would have thought he would have put his chip in your phone otherwise he wouldn't have access to any of his own numbers.

See, what i'm thinking is he put his chip in to my moby and called "person X" and then replaced it with my chip. Then when I called he thought his chip was in it.

Oh Fuck.

It's possible, but like Frankie said, no need to jump to conclusions, it could be innocent.

The thing is, if you ask him if he did it, then he'll make more of an effort to hide what he's doing (that is if he is doing anything wrong), and he'll think you're being paranoid, which, if he is seeing someone else, will push him away and make him want to see them more. Just play it by ear, dont say anything for a little while.
Keep it to yourself, dont even hint anything's up till you're absolutely sure of what he's doing.

I can't do that! I'm not living with someone who is f*cking around om me! WHat do you think about me asking him if he used my phone with his chip and then asking him if he erased my call lists. I won't get angry - i'll just ask him in conversation?

How could it be innocent?

Innocently f*cking around behind my back is Ok?

True, but he would be taking a stupid risk using your phone to contact another woman!

Yeah it would. But we don't have a land line and we only have one moby between us now coz his ones broken. I think he thought it would be ok if he used his own chip. Coz then she/he wouldn't have my number would she? She would only have his number.


Should I pinch his chip and see if/who he called yesterday? Or is that an awful thing to do?

The thing is Rosie, you're not sure and until you're 100% sure I think you should keep quiet, that way he's more likely to give himself away. If he thinks you're checking up on him, watching him then he'll be more sneaky. Like I said, it could be innocent.
Just calm down, take a deep breath and be cunning and underhand about the whole thing. If you confront him without enough evidence he could talk his way out of it.

Ok. I'll see how it goes. I go home for lunch and I'll see what happens then.

Oh god.

If hes cheating on me I'll get my dad to blow his f*cking knee-caps off with his shotgun.

:|

Hey Rosie. I really dont think I'm good enough for your sister. She deserves someone who cares more about her than they do their ability to walk.

Do you trust him? If you trust him then why not just ask him, politely of course, just explain that you are sure its completely innocent and look at it from your point of view and explain what is going through your head. Dont sit on it, or your mind will start to "imagine" whats going on when it really isnt :)

ha!

What do you think about the situation sul? Does it sound suss or not?

I might go with gobbos suggestion.

Well if it was me I'd pretend I was all pissy about losing the numbers as there was one that I hadnt saved from an old school mate. Ask him why he done it. Judge his facial reactions and body language to see if he's pants are starting to smoulder when he gives you an explanation.

Will your phone bill nto tell you if he has used yuor phone ot not?

my god that was terrible spelling, sorry all.

well that is sort of true. I had my sisters number on there that I hadn't saved yet. Oh crap.
If he claims it was nothing to do with him - then what do i do?

I've phoned virgin to get the last numbers called on my phone, but then I remembered that he was using his phone with his number so i wouldn't have the number he dialled.

Hmmm, back to Sul's suggestion I reckon

I could steal his chip?

You could, but getting caughtin the act may have bad implications

Umm. True. It makes me just as bad i suppose.

Gobbo's idea is the most practical approach!

Maybe I dont completely understand but:

- if he uses his chip in your phone, the phone has his number, his phone-numbers in memory and his credit. Is it not possible he used his chip so he could find the number(s) he needed and not use your credit ?

- Would taking your chip out and putting his in (and returning) not erase your calling history ?

- If he used his own chip to call someone he didn't want you to know about, why would he answer with ,"Don't call me on this number - i've already told you this isn't my phone" ?because the person would have called his own number not yours.

I agree with gobbo, just ask him calmly what you want to know. You might be worrying over nothing and get a plausible answer and feel much better. I'm sure that when you talk to him you will get a better feeling of whether he is trying to hide something or not.
Lots of luck Rosie.

Hmmm i quite like suls idea...

They are both decent ideas.

Miki - I dialled a number, doubled checked it was in the memory then took the chip out. It was still there. So the call lists have definately been erased on purpose.

I think he answered the call like that coz he thought his chip was still in the phone.

I will talk to him at lunchtime and see what he says. I'll ask him calmly and won't start a row. Although I know he will think I'm doing a "Quincy" on him and get all angry....

I thought the recent call list was stored on the phone not on the chip, so even if he did use his chip he would still have to erase the call list to hide who he called!?!

Sounds to me (sorry Rosie) like he is a dirty dog!

If you really want to stay with him confront him, otherwise shoot the fucker!

Yes it is stored on the phone, thats why hes erased them.

Not to fear, if you want to get revenge (if he is cheating on you) then I know a man who would be over the moon to help you!

Well good luck whatever you do rosie.

I'll speak to him first and see how the land lies. THEN I'll get the stupid twats legs blown to bits!..

Suspecting someone of an affair is a really tricky one, but keeping quite for a bit is also good. Why not wait a week and then repeat the exercise, leave your mobile at home again, see what happens.

If you want to accuse someone of an affair, it is far better to catch them with evidence, eg phone numbers, which you can then dial and trace.

However, this kind of problem is one of those open ended jobs, when you start digging, you can get pissed off because you dont find anything. It depends how you really feel about him. I like Suls idea best I think, dont let him think you suspect something, not just yet.

Ultimately, its your decision, but my advice is not to rush. Good luck Rosie xx

haha!

:)

I'm really upset. One half of me thinks he would never cheat on me and the other half keeps reminding me that he is a bloke and thats what blokes do. (sexist comment-sorry!)

I'm just going to ask him when I get home. The more I think about it, the more I feel sick.

HALLA!
Anyway...


Hmm...
This is what I think happened.
Bloke wanted to talk to woman, but his phone was broken, so he rang her with yours, and she stored your number.
She then phoned him back, and he realised that she had your telephone number.
That bit could have happened some time ago.
Now, today you ring him from work, comes up on the phone as witheld, and he assumes it her, hence answering the way he does.
Then he thinks 'shit' and deletes the call list.
Up to this point, it's pretty suspicious.
Then he's overly nice and runs you a bath?
Now it's almost a fact.
=/

Columbo eat your heart out!!!!

HALLA! Grim...


Right. Now I'm definatly going to ask the cheating sod what the f*cking hell hes been up to.

My 2 cents...

I'm the kind of person who would answer my girlfriends phone and say "I told you not to call me on this number." And my gf would expect that because she knows that I think I'm funny.

This obviously isn't the kind of behaviour you expect from him. Is he the kind of person who makes jokes like that? Would the number you called him from show up in the screen and say "Rosie Work" or something similar or do you already have grounds to doubt him and this has just bought them in to the open? I mean, if it's the ONLY thing that's happened to make you thinks he's cheating on you, I'd go with the paranoid fuckwit. If him doing something nice for you like running a bath after you've been at work all day and he been at home makes you paranoid then maybe you shouldn't be with him, but not because he's cheating on you. If I'd been at home all day and my missus came home from work (last gf was a trainee doctor) she'd expect, nay, DEMAND that a bath had been run for her. And Dinner. And a foot massage.

I am not a relationship expert. But if that's all you've got to go on, I'm going with the "paranoid fuckwit" explaination.

BTW. Some models of phone don't retain the call list if you remove the battery. What do you need to do to change the SIM card? Why delete the WHOLE call list when he could selectively delete the incriminating ones, if there were any to begin with?

Sounds to me like his infidelity is only matched by his stupidity. sorry sweetheart :(

Well, I feel like a right bitch. I just went home and asked him of he had put his chip in my phone and he said yes "to call work". Then I asked him about the deleted call lists and he said that my phone ran out of charge at the weekend and that could be the reason why. (Which it did!)

He asked why i was asking and I said I was just being stupid.

I feel a bit horrid now!

:)

Next time, read my response before storming in.

He lies.

Make a call, take the battery out of the phone, wait five minutes, put the battery back in, check the list.

£5 says it's still there.

Nah! I know its still there if i take the battery out coz i tried it this morning.

It may be different if I leave the battery to drain..

thats what I'm sticking with anyway!

I'm sure he wouldn't cheat on me. (now!)

If anything - he was probably sneaking off to the pub with his mates!

:D

Nah! I know its still there if i take the battery out coz i tried it this morning.
Okay...

It may be different if I leave the battery to drain..
I'd be very, very suprised.

thats what I'm sticking with anyway!
Aren't you engaged to this guy?

I'm sure he wouldn't cheat on me. (now!)
Pfft. Men are only as faithful as their options.

If anything - he was probably sneaking off to the pub with his mates!
If you say so, mate.

Ooh, you cynic.

:(


I'm 95% sure that hes not cheating on me.

I'll still keep my eyes and ears open though and update you on any strange behaviour.

interesting article

:(


I'm sure he isn't doing the dirty on me. I'm sure hes telling the truth.

*fingers crossed*


PS: Pinch, Punch First Day Of The Month!

I am sure you will be fine rosie, it sounds very innocent, but then again i do not know Simon

I dought it's the battery running out, but if it took him some time to change SIM chips (after all, it's not his phone), that could mean that the dialed numbers list, etc goes.

When I changed SIM chips with my bird the other day, it took me a while (stupid nokia), and when I turned it back on the information (such as the time and date AND call list) had gone - this is probally what happened.

Hope he isn't cheating on you, and I dought that he is, but if you do find out he is i'm sure someone on these boards will offer to make you feel better!

beargod you ARE simon

yay for jlittle!! I'm sure thats what happened.

:D

so a happy ending, a reasonable excuse for everything.

apart from "Don't call me on this number - i've already told you this isn't my phone".

He said it was a joke.

He said he was joking.

His sense of humour is a bit wicked.

Jlittle, it's 'doubt'

I'm in a pedantic mood today :D

:)

Wicked? You mean 'crap' surely?

yeah. He can be a git sometimes.

Damn you frankie, i was gonna be pedantic and point out "doubt", now i feel restless and want to point out spelling mistakes.

:)

why wud you want to doo that?

vic you have awful spelling sometimes, its "u" not "you", and its "dat" not "that".

Tsk

damn sorry.

in the meantime, just open an MJ thread in the intro's and watch those spelling gimps roll in.

Heh