Discussion » What I Did Last Night

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Posted by RUSS, 15:43, 20th October 2003:
 
went to see David Blaine come out of his box.
Posted by arsepuppy, 15:51, 20th October 2003:
 
My friday night (this is sadly all true)

Me and some friends from Bristol (who were up for the weekend) went out to the local indie club. A rather pretty girl (Kate Bush's mini-me, perhaps) chatted me up. I played hard to get due to having a g/f I'm happy with, etc. So, me and my mates were chatting to her outside the club (it turned out she was a lapdancer), during which time at one point a homeless guy starts talking shit to us. Anyway, I digress. For some reason she ends up coming back with us to my place. I thought "fair enough", thinking it'd be quite innocent and that.

After listening to tunes, etc until 6am I gave her a spare sleeping bag. She then came out with this....

"Would anyone have any objections if I took my clothes off?"
Us: "..."

So she did. Ahem. (The lights were off but it was 6am so there was some light seeping in through the window)

Anyway I went to bed, fully clothed as is the law with all-male sleepovers. When I woke up, what did I see next to me? Only a flippin' naked lapdancer next to me in my bed sleeping :/

(I kept my hands to myself, don't worry. Good boy really, me)
Posted by Victor Menendez, 16:02, 20th October 2003:
 
I'll draft a nice reply after i've had a smoke and some of the anger has gone away.
Posted by arsepuppy, 16:05, 20th October 2003:
 
Nothing happened though. I wouldn't do that. But the situation was fucking weird. She came into my bed when I was asleep o_O
Bit of a headfuck, that.
Posted by Sul, 16:10, 20th October 2003:
 
I bet you had a good look though didnt ya ;)
Posted by arsepuppy, 16:13, 20th October 2003:
 
we all did ;)
Posted by arsepuppy, 16:36, 20th October 2003:
 
Later on, we all went to a chinese restaurant, and one of my mates was trying to sound all sophisticated, with all the "s'ok, we're not normally like this, you just caught us at a weird time" (we were cracking shit jokes all day, like thinking of board game/porn hybrids, like "Fuckaroo". "You have to keep the donkey in it")Anyway, as my mate was trying to look "cool" as it were, the waitress gave us our desserts. To which my other mate exclaimed quite loudly, spoon in hand, "LET BATTLE COMMENCE!!".

You had to be there at the time, I guess.
Posted by arsepuppy, 16:40, 20th October 2003:
 
Mate takes out driving license card. It has a photo of him looking quite young.

(points to photo)"Hey...... Terminator 2"
(other mate)"You look nothing like Linda Hamilton"
Posted by Grim..., 16:51, 20th October 2003:
 
/tumbleweed
Posted by arsepuppy, 16:52, 20th October 2003:
 
*looks up*

"cracking shit jokes all day"

WHOOOOSH!
Posted by arsepuppy, 16:54, 20th October 2003:
 
tsk, innit.
Posted by Victor Menendez, 17:18, 20th October 2003:
 
Im more impressed with the way you have hijacked RUSS's lovely thread for your own evil purposes.
Posted by WarHead, 23:07, 20th October 2003:
 
Getting back to the original post, I bet you DID keep your hands to yourself, but didn't the shaking of the bed wake her up?
Posted by chandler, 00:14, 21st October 2003:
 
the ORIGINAL post was "went to see David Blaine come out of his box."
Posted by jlittle, 08:13, 21st October 2003:
 
AP - are you sure you didn't get drunk enough to not remember if you did anything or not?!?

I'm happy with my bird, but it a lapdancer was lying next to me with no clothes on and up for it.....;)
Posted by Grim..., 08:43, 21st October 2003:
 
I'd be told off if I didn't =]
Posted by RUSS, 08:45, 21st October 2003:
 
YEAH you bastard bumdog you did nick my thread. fuck it your story is better.... was she good looking? what happened in the morning? did she just wake up put her clothes on and go home?
Posted by jlittle, 09:04, 21st October 2003:
 
and say thanks? :D
Posted by Victor Menendez, 13:07, 21st October 2003:
 
You see, you think you were doing the 'good boy' thing, but in fact, you ruined that poor girls self-confidence. gets naked, throws herself at you, you turn her down. wow thats gotta hurt. you heartless bastard.
Posted by arsepuppy, 13:38, 22nd October 2003:
 
(She stayed for three days o_O)

Sorry RUSS! Won't happen again!


hee hee
Posted by arsepuppy, 13:38, 22nd October 2003:
 
LOL@WarHead, btw.
Posted by WarHead, 22:25, 22nd October 2003:
 
Thank you. My day has not been entirely wasted.
Posted by Redmaiden, 22:42, 22nd October 2003:
 
arsepuppy, how on earth did she manage to wangle 3 days free accomodation? are you a doormat?
Posted by friday, 07:35, 23rd October 2003:
 
Reddy - by offering free naked entertainment! Who would throw out a beautiful woman who claims to be a dancer and likes to wander around in the nude?

another woman maybe?

:-)

(edit - I actually posted "my offering" instead of "by" - geez sometimes I am so generous)
Posted by arsepuppy, 13:27, 23rd October 2003:
 
Reddy: Free ciggies, innit.
Posted by arsepuppy, 13:27, 23rd October 2003:
 
oh yeah, and the nudeyness.
Posted by Foghorn Leghorn, 13:34, 24th October 2003:
 
Was she nude all the time she was there?
Posted by arsepuppy, 13:35, 24th October 2003:
 
no.

let's change the subject now :)
Posted by WarHead, 13:36, 24th October 2003:
 
Do you think she really was a lapdancer or was she just trying to be more alluring?
Posted by Foghorn Leghorn, 13:38, 24th October 2003:
 
Ok, change of subject.

Today I have to write a new process for Non-Geo number porting :(
Posted by WarHead, 13:32, 25th October 2003:
 
I don't get it. What's the punch line?
Posted by beargod, 16:26, 25th October 2003:
 
non-geo or neo-geo?