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• Hello!

I was reading that rather interesting thread "I hate London," and must say that London is not a shithole. Well, it is, but so is the rest of the UK. I want to get out of this godforsaken country as soon as I possibly can. Dirty London. Stuck in traffic all the bloody time. The state of the roads is atrocious. And the pavements? What pavements? Half the time it's just crappy (not an expression, really is crappy) tarmac where the pavements are supposed to go. So goddamn ugly. It's so dirty. The whole goddamn place reeks of sewers. It wasn't this bad five or ten years ago. Public transport?! A one day travelcard costs more than a fiver. And you're stuck in a seriously overcrowded train - the windows are steamed up and it's pissin' down outside. Aw you just wanna die! The grafitti, the horrible train stations, and I won't even waste my time moaning about the underground and buses (which, by the way, make me wanna puke). Most people are nasty. Not all. It's true that there are plenty of great people in London. Not surprising, though, if the city's got millions of people. And I mean, the climate isn't that bad, if you like damp "winters" and damp and humid "summers". "Winters" - well, it's more or less the same from October till April. Cold, damp, windy, wet. Constant autumn. No winter to speak of. Except it feels colder than Siberia when you haven't seen the sun in months, and when the cold wind is driving the drizzle in your face. And "summers"? Yes. Most of the time it's cloudy, and if it isn't, the sun is half-obscured by ten miles of haze. Oh, so it was dry this year, for the first time in God-knows-how-many years. Oh, and it was hot. But it was horrible hot. Humid... the sky was white. It was disgusting. As for the quality of life... Quality of life!? Even if you're rich there's no point in living here. I don't understand people who do. But, I don't care. They can stay here and rot. If you're not rich, you're probably working 20 hours a day and getting pissed out of your head every Friday night. Don't you just love it? To be honest, I wish London was better. But it is just horrible, and there is no denying that. Unless you're deluded, or don't know any better. Still, I hope that London improves. Nobody deserves to suffer like Londoners do every day. Nobody... And most of the time, we just accept it... We can even smile, have fun and try and enjoy our lives. But for much of the time, many of us are depressed, overworked, and don't quite know what is wrong with our lives, or how we could make them better. Many Londoners are a great bunch (most are not). But they should all move out of London.

UNDER BRIDGES! Especially train bridges - MY GOD! Those spikes, and the dead pigeons! It is HORRIBLE! They're rotting there, with their heads trapped in the mesh until the neck rots off and the pigeon falls onto the road surface to be run over by buses until it turns into a grey-pink pancake. It is a absolutely awful. And the pigeonshit all over the place!

And I forgot to mention the rats. Yeah. For the first time in my life, I've seen rats in London. I always knew there were as many, or more, rats than people in London. But now I see them everywhere. Maybe it's just me, but I swear, there's a plague of those dirty, disease-ridden rodents.

thanks for that.

You're welcome, Mr Bing. :)

you are all so stupid if you really think london is the worlds shit pit. most of what you have described is thatchers legacy. have you ever been down brick lane? the lovly smell of the food like no where else in the world or camden market? all the different cultures ,art galleryes and the attack on this countrys whether! like its londons fault! and most of the time its not that bad (even when its pissin with rain) and the whole tube issue will get better. also rats breed like well.. rats so no wonder their is loads!

I like Camden market

I like London. I also like the 'Thatchers legacy' thing, Even Labour have realised they can't blame everything on a prime minister that left office THIRTEEN years ago.

They know but they are still getting away with as the Murdoc press hated Major but are Tory, bit odd. But it has lead to this acceptance of spin and all of the evil that it entails...

As for the tube, the jubilee line extension rules. fantastic new stations built with more poured concrete than the mind can comfertably imagine (see Canary Wharf). the DLR is pretty cool too.

i like london. not because it's necessarily great - it's just better than everywhere else.

The DLR is a fucking rollercoaster. It rules!

The Jubilee line extension cost 350 million quid per mile. I should hope its good.

I have always prefered avoiding towns, whether it is london or eastbourne, I have preffered the country cos it feels alot better to take a walk over a field then a four lane jam packed street

I love London to visit but don't think I'd want to live there.

Edinburgh is great. It's not too big and yet a fairly cosmopolitan capital city. Loads of shops, restaurants and bars all of which are walkable. It still has it's share of assholes but so does everywhere.

I hate living in tonbridge, although its not as bad as middlesbrough

I love London! Great place to visit. I'm going to be moving to a place in Northern Ireland in 4 weeks time where the assholes apparently outnumber cool folk at a ratio of 6:1!
Woo Hoo!

the thing about walking across a field is that once you've done it, you're the other side of a dull boring field. when you walk across the road (4-lane road in central london? i think not), you end up somewhere useful. the country's great, just very dull

I don't find it dull though cal, i find towns more dull. I find there nothing attractive in a town, i hate shopping, and thats all i can think is in a town other then ugly houses/flats. I find walking around in the country, it feels nice and looks good

BG, where in Middlesbrough did you used to live. Lived there as a kid. The yellow sky-line over the chemicals plant is quite pretty (from a distance).

Me,chandler and gobbo, all lived on the uni campus, then gobbo and i moved to kildare street off paliament road and chandler moved to parliament road

To the sad idiot who wrote the first article,
Wake up you sad twat! The only reason why you care so much about what London looks like is because you have nothing better to talk about. London is not a horrible city. If you are in the poor parts of course it looks shabby. I have visited many cities and you don't know what a bad city is!!!! So if i were you i would not speak out so strongly about how you think London is a shithole when actually you are over exaggerating- i have lived in London for 16 years, its one of the most attractive capitals in the world.

Not been to Rome then, yeah?

Or Budapest?

Or Madrid?

I like London. I have no particular problem with it, but to call it one of the most attractive capitals is stretching credibility a little.

(*&(*&^(^*(^

oh maann
Canberra is bad

Canberra? What are you talking about, you crazy female?


I was just guessing. I figured it might look nice, even if it wasn't

:)

La-La-La La-La-La.

i'm not crazy - just slightly mental

"I'm mad me, yeah"

"Don't you try to out-wierd me! I get stranger things than you free with my breakfast cereal!"

i miss getting fun things in breakfast cereal
all you get these days is stupid CD Roms

"I have always prefered avoiding towns, whether it is london or eastbourne"

*thud*

yay for zaphod references :)

hehe
:D
you hoopy frood, you

i'm so cool you could keep a side of meat in me for a week. i'm so hip i have trouble seeing over my pelvis.

The only reason you people say you hate London/Britain is because you've lived only there. (MOST of you, I'd say, not all). You should realize that EVERY place has its positive and negative aspects. Okay, sorry to the rest of you, but that first person just irritated me.
beware: ignorant question: what's zaphod?

/beats idiot with stick

Anyone unaware of Hitch Hikers or Douglas Adams references is scum, scum, scum.

I bet lickitysplit doesn't even know where his towel is.

HE'LL never get out of this planet, that's for sure

probably has enough salt in his system though. just not from peanuts.

heh heh

Oh, Brock you're so pretentious. I live in *America*. That's right. Not the UK. And, I don't regularly visit the BBC website to scour the pages for a scrap of information missed by CNN. Though, riviting it may be.
Belgium, :P. And, I'm a she.

Errrr... Nope. I claim no position of merit, merely that people should be aware of the work of one of the greatest literary genius's of the modern world. That's all.

Learn the definitions of words afore you use them, sweet-pea. And the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy has been sold all over the world, including that large pot of festering blinkered vision that is the US. Just because it doesn't originate from your country doesn't give you an excuse for not having heard of it as it is, quite rightly, world famous. Get out more, or maybe just read more.

Up your bum!

:)

"Claiming or demanding a position of distinction"
"Anyone unaware of Hitch Hikers or Douglas Adams references is scum, scum, scum."
Huh. Okay. And, I am aware the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy has been sold around the world. That still doesn't change the fact that I haven't heard about it or Douglas Adams until I visited this site. However, I did not know that not being aware of something waranted beating the idiot with a virtual stick. Thanks so much.
What do you think about America?

But, I must admit that your few words about the US was quite eloquent.

I'll give you that. : P

brock's pulled ;)

Brock's pulled? For the beating idiot with a stick comment?

'were quite eloquent,' you wombat.

And don't bother trying to excuse yourself by saying you're not familiar with Douglas Adams' work; if you feel you've been treated unfairly here ..... join the club.

knowing my luck, she'll be 13, or something.

:(

Would that be good luck or bad luck for you?

I'm not considering adoption currently, so I would consider it bad luck. Although it would mean that it is unlikely that she has developed the 'psychopath' gene that most of the women that I come into contact with (so to speak) seem to have developed.

*^*^&*(^(&^

Be-Bap-A-Lula.

psycho chicks

scary

If I was Grim, I would try and claim complete ignorance of my cock-up, Vic, and deny it's existence.

However, as I am not such an arsehole, I shall merely say "Bugger" and change it with my most excellent time travelling skills...

/turns nose up at Grim

edit: That first sentence in no way implies that I had my cock 'up' Mr Menendez, no matter which way you read it. So don't bother!!!

or in this case, the virtual stick

Oh, yes, yes, I made a grammatical error. You are SO intelligent for pointing it out.
Was I trying to excuse myself for never hearing of something? I wasn't aware.

How have you been treated unfairly here?

hey licketysplit, do yourself a favo[u]r --hell, do everyone a favour-- and have a bit of a read around some of the threads to get at least an inkling of the language used and protocols followed and intelligence applied on the iamcal forums.

To be fair his/her language isn't as bad as it could be. I mean compared to some of the morons I've seen on here. (Of course this is entirely my opinion, and I think that most people are morons. Wait... that's not to say that I think this licketysplit is way above them. Ack. I give up.)

fear not, we see what you mean. and yes, s/he wasn't being highly obnoxious. on the other hand, s/he was throwing around assertions and "defences" etc which kinda indicated s/he'd never got out of this thread. running jokes take a while to understand.

Yeah. When you ask them what they mean, they're normally all out of breath...

sorry

I say, APPROVE LITEARYSPIT!

Actually, ban them now.

Dear god, this indecision.

approved

Two words;

"hostile susan"

Just spotted this:


If you were Grim..., you'd have sex more than once a year.

Up yours, biatch.

Bastard! Who told him about my achilles heel?

although I actually had sex twice last Sunday. Up yours, lumpy.

by yourself doesn't count

:D

Ah. Ok.

:(

Sorry, but that is such a '14 year old' type comment. Bit like what the pondlife on the intro threads like to spit out, even though the closest it gets to reality is them accidentally creaming their trews due to extreme keck tightness.

I'm not saying you don't get it, but surely you're getting a bit old for the 'you should get laid, innit' schtick?

innit

ap is a big gayer

virgin, virgin, ap is a virrrrrgin

i still don't get the "hostile susan" thing, doc. i need explanaficatoriness. in small simple words so little ap can follow along

hey that's tricky. if you add an [a href]etc with no href but a title, cal's parser strips the link-indication but still displays the title. hover over ap in prev.post to see what i mean.

er, fantastic. I'll alert the media.

"media here. what? what! you're kidding! wow!!
[aside]HOLD THE FRONT PAGE!!!![/aside]
go on, sir, i'm listening. tell me everything."

Okay, this is a hostile susan

Big round table. Made of wood. Chairs around it. The table has two circles, an outer and an inner, like the rings of saturn. Yeah. So I'll call the outer part the "rings of saturn", and the inner part "saturn itself", for the sake of clarity. Picture Saturn in your head if you have a problem imagining what this table looks like. But flat. Not entirely two dimensional. But made of wood. Flat wood. The rings of saturn is the outer part. A large circle made of wood. Possibly slats of wood. Upon this, there lies the smaller part, saturn itself. This is also a circle made of wood, and lies exactly in the centre of the rings of saturn. In outside versions of this table arrangement, you have a hole through the middle of the two giving you the opportunity to place an umbrella through the middle. Now here's the clever bit. The saturn itself revolves. Using a clever system, possibly involving ball bearings, you are able to easily rotate the saturn itself round, with the centre being the theoretical umbrella hole. Therefore, if you are sitting at the table, you are easily able to reach over the rings of saturn and turn saturn itself round. A carton of orange juice or a pepper mill, placed upon the saturn itself, can be easily passed or moved closer to another person sitting around the rings of saturn. This central, saturn itself, device is known as a Hostile Susan. It is a real device and not something wacky.

I'm with AP with the seXXoring. I bet you've never even been with a woman!

i own one of those
except i call it a 'lazy me'

Su 0wNZ hostile susan

hostile susan worships saturn