Posted by
friday, 06:05, 11th November 2003:
An 8 year old boy walks home from school each day past an 8 year old
girl's house. One day as he is passing by, carrying a football, he can't
resist taunting the girl. He holds up the football and says "See this
football? Football is a boys' game, and only boys can have a football!"
The little girl runs into the house and cries to her mother, "I want a
football!" Being a woman of the 90's, her mother runs out and gets her
one.
The next day the girl is waiting for the little boy and he rides up on
his bike. She holds up the football "Nah Na Nah Nah." The little boy
angrily points to his bike and says "Oh yeah, well this is a boys' bike and
only boys get boys' bikes and you can't have one!" She runs in to mom and
the next day is waiting for him on her new boys' bike.
The little boy gets furious and pulls down his pants, and pointing to his
most private of parts says "Look, only boys have these and your mom can't
buy you one!!!"
The next day he walks by and asks her "Well, I guess I showed you!" to
which she promptly pulls up her dress, points to her parts and proclaims,
"My mother tells me that as long as I have one of these I can have as
many of THOSE as I want!"
Posted by
Orinoco, 12:51, 11th November 2003:
A little boy was woken up in the middle if the night by some strange noises coming from his parents room, he got up sneaked up to his parent's room's door & peered round the corner. He saw his mum sitting on top of his dad frantically bouncing up & down. The little boy was so confused & frightened that he ran back to his room, jumped back into his bed & threw the covers over his head.
The next day at breakfast the little boy decided to confront his mum about what he saw last night & asked what she was doing to his dad. Horrified & struggling for an answer his mum, came up with a story that she thought would do until her son was a lot older.
"Well your daddy is getting a little bit tubby as he gets older so to help keep him slim I sit on his stomach & bounce on top of him to squeeze some air out of him."
"That won't do much good" the little boy replied, "every day after you go to work another lady comes round & blows him back up again."
Posted by
WarHead, 23:24, 11th November 2003:
A little boy is talking to his mummy and suddenly asks, "Do ladies come to bits?"
"No," replies his mummy, "why do you ask?"
"Well, daddy and Uncle George were looking over the fence at the lady next door sunbathing, and daddy said he'd like to screw the arse off her."
Posted by
friday, 08:05, 12th November 2003:
Little Lucy went out into the garden and saw her cat Mickey lying on the ground with its legs shut and its legs in the air.
She fetched her dad to look at mickey and on seeing the cat he said,as gently as he could,"I'm afraid micky is dead Lucy."
"So why are his legs sticking up in the air like that,Daddy?"asked Lucy as she fought back the tears.
At a loss for something to say,the father replied, "Mickey's legs are pointing up in the air so that it will be easier for God to float down from heaven above and grab a leg and lift mickey up to heaven."
Little Lucy seemed to take mickey's death quite well,However, two days later when her father came home from work Lucy had tears in her eyes and said,"Mommy almost died this morning .
" Fearing something terrible had happend ,the father shook the girl and shouted,"How do you mean Lucy?tell daddy!"
"Well,"mumbled Lucy, "Soon after you left for work this morning I saw mommy lying on the floor with all her legs in the air and she was shouting."Oh Jesus!!I'm comming !!!I'm comming!!! and if it hadn't been for the milkman holding her down she would definately have gone daddy."
Posted by
WarHead, 09:27, 12th November 2003:
Many happy returns to that joke, which is about 50 years old today.