Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day.
It is good for girl to meet boy in park, but better for boy to park meat in girl.
Anybody got n e better one's? Could do with a laugh, work's destroyed my will to live.
Posted by
Grim..., 11:57, 28th November 2003:
Deep breath...
A true gentleman is one who can play the bagpipes--and doesn't.
A pat on the back is only a few centimeters from a kick in the butt.
Don't be irreplaceable, if you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.
To err is human, to forgive is not our policy.
If you are good, you will be assigned all the work. If you are really good, you will get out of it.
People who go to conferences are the ones who shouldn't.
When confronted by a difficult problem you can solve it more easily by reducing it to the question, "How would the Lone Ranger handle this ?"
If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
The severity of the itch is proportional to the reach.
The older I get, the better I was.
Madonna said she doesn't care if it's a boy or a girl, as long as it's bisexual.
Crowded elevator always smell different to midget.
Dumb man climb tree to get cherry, wise man spread limbs.
Don't drink and park - accidents cause people.
State of pregnancy exist when woman takes seriously something poked in fun.
He who buries a man's wife alive, should not expect to sit at that man's dinner table without the subject coming up.
He who plays with self, pulls boner.
Baseball all wrong -- man with four balls cannot walk.
House without toilet is uncanny.
Man trapped in brothel get jerked around.
Man's wife his better half, his mistress his better whole.
Panties not best thing on earth, but next to it.
Man have more hair on chest than woman, but on whole woman have more.
Man who cut self while shaving, lose face.
Man who eats photo of father, soon spitting-image of father.
Man who lay woman on ground gets piece on earth.
Man who take sleeping pill and laxative on the same night will wake up in deep shit.
Man who pushes piano down mineshaft get tone of A flat miner.
Man who sneezes without tissue takes matters in his own hands.
Wise man never play leapfrog with unicorn.
Man who suck woman's tit make clean breast of things.
Rape impossible: Woman fun faster with skirt up, than Man with pants down.
Man who walk in middle of road get run over by bus.
Wife not part of furniture, until screwed on bed.
Woman laid in tomb may soon become mummy.
Man who fall in vat of molten glass make spectacle of self.
Man who jizz in cash register come into money.
Man with tight trousers is pressing his luck.
Man who gets kicked in testicles, left holding bag.
Man who crosses the ocean twice without washing is a dirty double crosser.
Man who drive like hell, bound to get there.
Man trapped in pantry have ass in jam.
Don't sweat the petty stuff ... and don't pet the sweaty stuff.
Woman who wear jockstrap have make believe ballroom.
Woman who slides down banister makes monkey shine.
Man who scratches ass should not bite fingernails.
Man who tell one too many light bulb jokes soon burn out.