iamcal.com Since May 2000

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• Hello!

I AM BACK!!

I've dumped my shit boyfriend and sorting out the financial mess he's left me in (which means no more little car) and I'm getting back on track. Hooray! I'm going to be completly and utterly selfish from now on and I'm concentrating on myself for a while. I'm sorry i've been ignoring everyone, But I've had to turn into the Queen Bitch from Hell for a time and it wasn't/isn't very pretty.

I've missed you lot. :)

WELCOME BACK ROSIE! WOOOOOOO!
Us men can be a bit shit sometimes. I apologise on the behalf of men everywhere.

Lo Rosie!

I'm pretty sure I was telling you to get rid of him about a year ago =]

HOORAY!!!! Welcome back Rosie! We missed you! We thought that you and Abe were holed up somewhere getting to know each other better ;)

What happened with the boyfriend?

Hes a shit - but hes gone now.

Grim..., : i wish i had listened to you - i may not have landed up in quite so much of a mess!

Anyhoo - shit happens!

Anyone got any exciting news then?

Hey Rosie.

I missed you too. Was starting to get a lip quiver... :(

So, erm, single then eh? How you doing? ;)

No exciting news on my side, Rosie.
:(

lol!

:D

WB Rosie - I'm back too.

Well done on dumping the shit of a bloke btw.

Thanks very much. It feels strange being single again though!

Hey Rosie, a irmã da ela que é sexy. Glad to hear everything is working out.

Well done Rosie, I wish you could advise my daughter on how to leave her boyfriend, she is lying in hospital at the moment having fell out of a window three stories up, while fighting with him, well she said she fell, I have my doubts on that one,

:O

Ouch. That's a mighty big fall. I saw Jackie Chan jump that once and he broke his ankle, I assume your daughter isnt specially trained like him though so I imagine the injurys are much worse.

Thats really dreadful. you could get him nicked. You can grass him up for domestic violence regardless of whether your daughter says it was an accident or not...

Although it would really piss her off.

I remember all your shit bloke postings. Pleased he's gone & Welcome back. It hasn't been the same without you.

well I know he won't get near her for a few weeks because after she has came out of hospital she will be comming to my house to stay, as she is unable to walk ( her ankle is badly broken) and I wont allow him in my home, so we will have time to work on her.

Thats really shitty. I've put my mother through hell going out with that scummy loser. I feel bad for not listening to her and for letting her see me being used by a twat for so long.

in the mean time if there is any big strong men out there, willing to act as body guard at my home for 6 to 8 weeks to a beautiful 19 year old girl, I can't pay much but I am a fantastic cook, and you won't have to washup because I have a dishwasher.

Where do you live?

:D

Rosie, I try to keep out of business as much as possible , because I have learned in the past that if I advise her she does the opposite, because after all she is a teenager, and we all know that teenages know everything.

Brock I live in Sunderland

Then tell her that he is the best thing that ever happened to her, then.

Duh. obvious

Cool. I used to live in the Toon, so am well aware of that part of the world...

actually Brock she saw your photo and she said you were quite nice

Brock I have tried that, that is the only time the bint has agreed with me

Glad to hear you got rid of that tossweasel, Rosie
:) You and Vic really need to meet in real life. I can vouch for the benefits of meeting iamcal people in real life :D

I AM nice! :D

I have an alternative idea. She can come and stay in my flat in Buckingham. It's too far for idiot-boy to find it, and it's on the second floor, so once I've carried her up there she won't be able to sneak/hop out and go to see him.

Obviously, I would only be able to keep your lovely daughter hostage with your (and preferably her!) approval and consent.

Still, the offers there!

Just noticed this:

Brock, 10:52 31 March 2004 [edit] :
Hey Rosie.

I missed you too. Was starting to get a lip quiver... :(

So, erm, single then eh? How you doing? ;)
- -
Rosie, 11:11 31 March 2004 :
lol!

:D


I get that a lot... :(

doesn't surprise me

*cough*tosser*cough*

Brock is a lovely young man, and Rosie/janine's daughter would be in good hands. He gets my stamp of approval.

:)

You're great, Uma. I've always said that...

...which says a lot coming from Ms. Iron Pants

Of course, if I was in the UK, I'd be trying to get you myself, in which case I wouldn't be advertising your virtues to the other laydeez

Hmmm. Half flattered, but half not, cos you keep going on about how desperate you are.

Kind of takes the shine of the compliment, really! ;)

You are one who will always see the cloud and never the silver lining. ;) And when did I say I was desperate? I need a you-know-what, not a boyfriend. They don't mean the same thing you know.

You ungrateful bastard, Brock.


Janine, what a terrible thing to happen to your daughter. Thank dog it was only a broken ankle. That's a long way to fall.

Rosie: I hope things start working out for you now.

I think you should all get together and beat him up a bit.

...a lot, not just a bit.

And I'm not ungrateful! It's just if Uma would chase me cos she's desperate, then I have to say I've had more heartfelt compliments!

Brock, you have my consent, I will tell her when she wakes up from her op. ( she is in the operating theatre as we speak), I will put her on a train probably friday and send her down to you, you Can't miss her she will be the one that looks like the lead singer from the corrs and she will have a slight limp

Righto.

/salivates

Hi Rosie, glad you're back and great news about getting back on track :)
my only news is that Im in London, so if you wanna meet ...

janine, very sorry to hear about your daughter, hope it works out for her

YAY! hello Miki!

:)

hiya :)

and nobody hates you and everybody wants to talk to you and Im sure abe will surface somewhere from a tube tunnel soon, kicking himself for missing your pages ;-)

That's right. We miss you talking about your Tesco's knickers and the exciting things you snailmail to people.

AWWWW
thanks x

♥

though those vitamin C tablets made me feel funny :(

:D

did they put a spring in your step?

did you see the imposter claiming to have your knickers ?
here

They put a grumble in my tummy

(the tablets, not your knickers)

Oh Bloody Hell!

I'm going to be famous for having horrid pants now! This has probably reduced my chances of getting another bloke even more!

:)

nope ;)

I second that ;)

I really don't think so Rosie. The only interest they have in your pants is getting to the contents.

You mean you swallowed some tablets that a strange girl (no offense Rosie) sent you in the post??

Was that wise?

Anyway, Rosie, as you freely admit that your pants, erm, ain't the best, surely I will be helping you out and doing you a favour by trying my hardest to get you out of them?

Just a thought...

Warhead I didnt really eat them. They looked rank.

(again, the pills, not rosies pants)

hey Rosie!

I love that Rosie sends people stale vitamin pills! That rocks!

Its ok Chay, my pants are rank. Hey, I wore a little thong the other day under my jeans. When I took them off to get in the bath I had skiddies in my jeans but not my thong. Very Odd.

Hiya AP.

Hahahahahaha!

Classic Rosie Post number 2367...

That's why I wear the full-briefs. They catch everything.

Its gross, i know. But how did it happen?

...er

i didnt realise adults got skiddies.
:S

Does it matter? Just wipe your arse properly in future, and try not to think about it.

Chay: They don't.

hee hee

"But how did it happen?"

well you know that roll of tissue that some people keep by the toilet? well some people wipe...

:D

my DOG! and i thought women didn't talk about things like that!
my youthful eyes have been tainted!

I rule-Chay sucks.

Get your own gags.

i posted in the same damned minute as you
:P

Its not a regular event. It just happened this once.

Maybe I should buy some wet tissue things. I'm a bit wary of them though as I'm slightly delicate down there.

I'd get my own gags but the adult shop had totally run out :(

I'm sure you can get one's for sensitive skin, people hardly develop tough skin down there anyways :)

Tell you guy's what, I could sure use some of Rosie's reversable midas touch thingy right now...

You have to admit that it's certainly not dull when Rosie is posting.

However, I'm not sure that I won't be having a rather disturbed night's sleep with all these images lodged in my cerebellum.

The phrase 'Too Much Information' could have been invented just for her, and yet her posts make strangely compelling reading.

Janine: I spent all evening at the train station yesterday. Your daughter didn't show, so now I have 2 bunches of "Get well soon" flowers, and a box of chocolates and a bottle of wine going spare. I had to send the Limo home as well.

She must have sneaked off the train somewhere between Sunderland and Milton Keynes and gone running (sorry, hopping) back to her bloke.

:(

That's probably my fastest rejection yet, I think. You know, blown out before I even spoke/met to someone. Do you think I may be eligible for a consolation prize? Maybe a certificate, or something?

:'(

can have me?

"my DOG! and i thought women didn't talk about things like that!
my youthful eyes have been tainted!"


sometimes we are way worse than blokes. justdepends on the mood

Brock, I am so sorry, I forgot to mention that she was still in hospital. She is however willing to come and stay with you for a while when she is discharged, and having explained to her who you are she herself is salivating.

See, you lot? I RAWK!

It'll end in tears.

If ever a statement epitomised my life...

I know what you mean. Whenever I hear "Ra Ra Rasputin, lover of the Russian queen" I think "*sigh* that's me all over".

Welcome back Rosie! I dont know you but you seem well loved here! And Janine I could always come over with me crossbow and saber. Im a damn good aim! Plus I always wanted to see more of the UK. :-P

SUL - Russia's Greatest Love Machine.

Hi Doc, how are ya this fine day?

That'd be about right. There is a statement that encapsulates all of "What it is to be Sul", and he gets it wrong.

And it's probabaly more like "Ra Ra Sulsputin, Rushin' through the loving thing".

Hello Brockles!

Hello, um, Um'lles!

Had a really weird chat on Flickr with Kallese last night. She's loopy!

In a nice way of course.

She's fabulous! One crazy kinda wonderful lady! You see, there's the attaction to flickr...there are some really nice people there (as there are here, of course)

Well, being as she has to sit in all day and wait for her pager to go off, so spends the whole day trawling the net, I'm not overly surprised!

That'd send me over the edge. There's some weird people out there...

The guy that just spews out all the stuff on the TV at the time is a classic example of weirder than weird. Took no interest in what people were saying, and didn't try to follow the conversation at all! Just kept putting the questions and answers of the TV quiz he was watching.

Classic question from him "Does America have Digital TV?"

I cracked up! Cos the US is famous for being behind on TV technology, isn't it? The UK is sooooo cutting edge!

Ha ha! Yes, sometimes I feel like i'm going dotty just reading some of it! You start thinking, what is this? The twilight zone? I think I am far too boring and normal for such things!

Although maybe normal is not really the right word...