Discussion » Mallet's Mallet

This is a read-only copy. The forum ran on iamcal.com from 2000 until its database was lost in 2016, and this topic was rebuilt from copies saved by the Internet Archive's Wayback Machine. Some replies may be missing.
Posted by Grim..., 15:25, 22nd April 2004:
 
It's really quiet at the moment, so:

Mallet's Mallet!

GO!
Posted by Grim..., 15:26, 22nd April 2004:
 
Station
Posted by syl, 15:47, 22nd April 2004:
 
bomb
Posted by Grim..., 15:49, 22nd April 2004:
 
suitcase
Posted by syl, 15:50, 22nd April 2004:
 
traveller
Posted by Miki, 15:53, 22nd April 2004:
 
ferry
Posted by Brock, 15:54, 22nd April 2004:
 
Mersey
Posted by syl, 15:55, 22nd April 2004:
 
land
Posted by Miki, 15:56, 22nd April 2004:
 
ahoy
Posted by Grim..., 15:56, 22nd April 2004:
 
pirate
Posted by Miki, 15:57, 22nd April 2004:
 
parrot
Posted by Grim..., 15:59, 22nd April 2004:
 
bird
Posted by Brock, 15:59, 22nd April 2004:
 
slut
Posted by Miki, 15:59, 22nd April 2004:
 
2can ( soz Grim...;-) )
Posted by Brock, 15:59, 22nd April 2004:
 
hahahaha that works so well!!

Guinness
Posted by Grim..., 16:02, 22nd April 2004:
 
I think we have to 'bonk' miki for associating 2can with 'Slut'.

Start us off again, Brock!
Posted by syl, 16:02, 22nd April 2004:
 
drunk
Posted by Grim..., 16:05, 22nd April 2004:
 
O_o
Posted by Miki, 16:05, 22nd April 2004:
 
(I didnt associate it with slut but with bird, Brick was too fast)

sul ;-)
Posted by RUSS, 16:05, 22nd April 2004:
 
skunk
Posted by Brock, 16:05, 22nd April 2004:
 
fetish
Posted by Miki, 16:06, 22nd April 2004:
 
leather
Posted by syl, 16:08, 22nd April 2004:
 
dry
Posted by Miki, 16:09, 22nd April 2004:
 
ice
Posted by Brock, 16:10, 22nd April 2004:
 
baby
Posted by Miki, 16:11, 22nd April 2004:
 
screaming
Posted by syl, 16:15, 22nd April 2004:
 
nerves
Posted by RUSS, 16:16, 22nd April 2004:
 
Endings
Posted by Brock, 16:22, 22nd April 2004:
 
beginnings
Posted by syl, 16:22, 22nd April 2004:
 
start
Posted by Brock, 16:28, 22nd April 2004:
 
jump
Posted by syl, 16:28, 22nd April 2004:
 
windows
Posted by syl, 16:29, 22nd April 2004:
 
high
Posted by Brock, 16:30, 22nd April 2004:
 
Sul
Posted by syl, 16:31, 22nd April 2004:
 
write


do i have you alone Brock?
*evil glint*
Posted by Brock, 16:37, 22nd April 2004:
 
sonnet

um...../glances over shoulder nervously
Posted by syl, 16:39, 22nd April 2004:
 
bonnet

excuse me for being dense, but how do you go from ice to baby?
Posted by Brock, 16:43, 22nd April 2004:
 
Bee

Ice, ice, baby. Vanilla Ice song that sampled "Under Pressure" by Queen. I couldn't be arsed to put the second "ice" in, and figured most people would get it.
Posted by syl, 16:49, 22nd April 2004:
 
bumble

thankyou
Posted by Brock, 16:52, 22nd April 2004:
 
fuck
Posted by syl, 16:54, 22nd April 2004:
 
fornicate

i am off now, brockles, to brave the traffic home
Posted by Brock, 17:03, 22nd April 2004:
 
breedster
Posted by jeffld, 17:26, 22nd April 2004:
 
egg
Posted by Brock, 17:27, 22nd April 2004:
 
lawyer
Posted by Perclissigi, 17:36, 22nd April 2004:
 
divorce
Posted by eatmypiano, 17:54, 22nd April 2004:
 
expensive
Posted by cal, 18:13, 22nd April 2004:
 
women
Posted by Brock, 18:19, 22nd April 2004:
 
nuts

:)
Posted by Kallese, 19:05, 22nd April 2004:
 
honey
Posted by Brock, 19:07, 22nd April 2004:
 
monster
Posted by Perclissigi, 19:18, 22nd April 2004:
 
brock
Part of me actually feel's bad for writing that
Posted by Brock, 19:36, 22nd April 2004:
 
omnipresent

the part that I'm going to beat with a stick, fuckface?
Posted by Rebecca, 21:13, 22nd April 2004:
 
omnipotent
Posted by Brock, 21:46, 22nd April 2004:
 
power
Posted by gobbo, 22:00, 22nd April 2004:
 
lines
Posted by Brock, 22:08, 22nd April 2004:
 
Snoopy

kind of!
Posted by gobbo, 22:23, 22nd April 2004:
 
Peanuts
Posted by Brock, 22:26, 22nd April 2004:
 
Easy
Posted by Brock, 22:26, 22nd April 2004:
 
Syl

Sorry! Couoldn't resist it!
Posted by WarHead, 22:54, 22nd April 2004:
 
legs
Posted by Brock, 23:04, 22nd April 2004:
 
apart
Posted by reitsma, 00:54, 23rd April 2004:
 
comb
Posted by jeffld, 01:23, 23rd April 2004:
 
crabs
Posted by Kallese, 01:47, 23rd April 2004:
 
butter
Posted by reitsma, 04:26, 23rd April 2004:
 
potato
Posted by Rebecca, 04:35, 23rd April 2004:
 
skin
Posted by friday, 07:24, 23rd April 2004:
 
cream
Posted by su, 08:02, 23rd April 2004:
 
pie
Posted by friday, 08:09, 23rd April 2004:
 
apple
Posted by WarHead, 08:54, 23rd April 2004:
 
crumble
Posted by Grim..., 09:04, 23rd April 2004:
 
iraq
Posted by syl, 09:44, 23rd April 2004:
 
oil
Posted by Grim..., 10:18, 23rd April 2004:
 
lubricate
Posted by Brock, 10:19, 23rd April 2004:
 
anal

hur hur hur
Posted by Grim..., 10:20, 23rd April 2004:
 
sprem
Posted by Brock, 10:26, 23rd April 2004:
 
tadpole

the temptation was, obviously, to put MJ
Posted by gobbo, 10:33, 23rd April 2004:
 
frog
Posted by gobbo, 10:33, 23rd April 2004:
 
french
Posted by janine, 10:51, 23rd April 2004:
 
stink
Posted by Brock, 10:56, 23rd April 2004:
 
deodorant
Posted by syl, 10:57, 23rd April 2004:
 
ozone
Posted by Grim..., 10:59, 23rd April 2004:
 
fucked
Posted by janine, 11:07, 23rd April 2004:
 
orgasm
Posted by Grim..., 11:13, 23rd April 2004:
 
come
Posted by Brock, 11:13, 23rd April 2004:
 
dancing
Posted by Grim..., 11:18, 23rd April 2004:
 
jiving
Posted by Brock, 11:20, 23rd April 2004:
 
Bear
Posted by syl, 11:26, 23rd April 2004:
 
head
Posted by Brock, 11:33, 23rd April 2004:
 
blow
Posted by gobbo, 11:34, 23rd April 2004:
 
job
Posted by Brock, 11:42, 23rd April 2004:
 
trapped
Posted by friday, 11:42, 23rd April 2004:
 
work
Posted by WarHead, 11:47, 23rd April 2004:
 
Hang on a minute, how did we get from 'jiving' to 'bear'?
Posted by eatmypiano, 11:52, 23rd April 2004:
 
play

it's actually dancing...bear
Posted by Grim..., 11:55, 23rd April 2004:
 
mars
Posted by Brock, 12:00, 23rd April 2004:
 
Marathon

Huggy Bear - Jive talk
Posted by friday, 12:01, 23rd April 2004:
 
run
Posted by janine, 12:12, 23rd April 2004:
 
fun
Posted by Grim..., 12:13, 23rd April 2004:
 
clown
Posted by WarHead, 12:14, 23rd April 2004:
 
Coco
Posted by Brock, 12:14, 23rd April 2004:
 
POP!
Posted by WarHead, 12:23, 23rd April 2004:
 
star
Posted by syl, 12:30, 23rd April 2004:
 
dust
Posted by WarHead, 12:32, 23rd April 2004:
 
bunny
Posted by syl, 12:35, 23rd April 2004:
 
Sunni

awfully sorry, i misspelt it. The only link is that is rhymes with bunny.sorry stupid one :( ha ha!) Sunni as in Sunni Muslims Although I think it may be pronouned "Soony" - not sure?
Posted by WarHead, 12:36, 23rd April 2004:
 
Alright then, what is a Sunni bunny?
Posted by Alfie, 12:45, 23rd April 2004:
 
The only link is that is rhymes with bunny
Posted by WarHead, 12:46, 23rd April 2004:
 
Is that allowed? I can't remember the rules to Mallet's Mallet.
Posted by syl, 12:50, 23rd April 2004:
 
Maybe I should just do another one, eh?

bunny------------->

hare
Posted by WarHead, 12:55, 23rd April 2004:
 
Lip
Posted by syl, 12:57, 23rd April 2004:
 
navel
Posted by WarHead, 12:57, 23rd April 2004:
 
WHAT?
Posted by su, 13:16, 23rd April 2004:
 
why
Posted by Brock, 13:24, 23rd April 2004:
 
not
Posted by RUSS, 13:28, 23rd April 2004:
 
because
Posted by Brock, 13:29, 23rd April 2004:
 
procrastination
Posted by Miki, 13:40, 23rd April 2004:
 
iamcal
Posted by Grim..., 13:46, 23rd April 2004:
 
iammatt
Posted by WarHead, 13:49, 23rd April 2004:
 
iamsureyou'resupposedtochallengewhensomeonebreakstherules.
Posted by syl, 14:01, 23rd April 2004:
 
maybenot
Posted by Grim..., 14:05, 23rd April 2004:
 
maybe
Posted by Miki, 14:07, 23rd April 2004:
 
(there are rules ???)

to be or not to be
Posted by arsepuppy, 14:10, 23rd April 2004:
 
Guildernstern
Posted by syl, 14:16, 23rd April 2004:
 
Rosenkranz (ie think it was)
Posted by Grim..., 14:17, 23rd April 2004:
 
(Ooh, I've just hit 4000 (and 1 now) replies!)
Posted by syl, 14:26, 23rd April 2004:
 
(why did you call yourself Grim?)
Posted by arsepuppy, 14:31, 23rd April 2004:
 
(and why does Grim... refer to himself in the third person all of the time?)
Posted by arsepuppy, 15:09, 23rd April 2004:
 
and so.

the thread.

dies.
Posted by Grim..., 15:15, 23rd April 2004:
 
Eh? I didn't call myself Grim...?
Posted by arsepuppy, 15:16, 23rd April 2004:
 
Nah, but you do do it a lot though.
Posted by Grim..., 15:17, 23rd April 2004:
 
What, call my self Grim...?

Er... And?
Posted by arsepuppy, 15:19, 23rd April 2004:
 
Just saying that sometimes you talk about yourself in the third person, and that. Just wondering why, that's all.
Posted by Grim..., 15:20, 23rd April 2004:
 
Oh, you mean like:

/runs

Or

/gets coat

?
Posted by arsepuppy, 15:25, 23rd April 2004:
 
No, I mean stuff like

"Grim... likes to do this"

"I think Grim... should drink last can of Fosters"

"Me Grimlock think this is bad idea"

etc..
Posted by syl, 15:30, 23rd April 2004:
 
Why did you choose the login name "Grim"?
Posted by syl, 15:31, 23rd April 2004:
 
Just idle curiosity...
Posted by arsepuppy, 15:32, 23rd April 2004:
 
It's an onamatapoeic word representing the noise his hooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooge turbochargers make.

Grim! Grim! Griiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiim!
Posted by syl, 15:55, 23rd April 2004:
 
Thought it might be some sort of interesting story back from his school days that he might have entertained us with.
Posted by Grim..., 15:56, 23rd April 2004:
 
Oh lordy, not the login question again.
Look here.

Turbochargers make hissing noises, 'tard
Posted by arsepuppy, 15:59, 23rd April 2004:
 
It's origins are geek-orientated if I remeber correctly. Something to do with using the handle "Grim Reaper" (ooh originality! ;p ) on an online computer game thing. Someone else not suprisingly had that name too so the compromise was to split the name in two. Matt became "Grim..." and the other guy became "..Reaper".


That's from memory though, I could be wrong here.
Posted by arsepuppy, 15:59, 23rd April 2004:
 
Should've used the search, dammit.
Posted by arsepuppy, 16:01, 23rd April 2004:
 
I don't give a fuck what noise a turbocharger makes due to AP rule #25324532:

"If it's a car, or anything to do with a car, then I don't care. Cars are shit m'kay"
Posted by Grim..., 16:11, 23rd April 2004:
 
Did I dump you in the past or something?

Jeeesus.
Posted by syl, 16:12, 23rd April 2004:
 
Okay, thankyou. :)

"If it's a car, or anything to do with a car, then I don't care. Cars are shit m'kay"

Cars are lovely, AP, especially the fast ones.
Posted by WarHead, 16:13, 23rd April 2004:
 
For that matter, why is arsepuppy called arsepuppy?

Cars are a damn expensive luxury, and not necessarily babe magnets, except when you're still a teenager, when girls seem to think it's cool that you have your own wheels, even if it is only a clapped out Astra.
Posted by arsepuppy, 16:14, 23rd April 2004:
 
Nah, just find cars dull, that's all.

"Did I dump you in the past or something?"

Throwing away soiled copies of Max Power and Front after the pages have become rigid doesn't count as 'dumping', tsk.
Posted by Brock, 16:14, 23rd April 2004:
 
Oh, and Grim...? Turbo's only hiss if they are leaking.

They *whistle*, or *whine*

Double retard with cherry on top.
Posted by arsepuppy, 16:15, 23rd April 2004:
 
WH: Read the FAQ. It's all there.
Posted by Grim..., 16:18, 23rd April 2004:
 
Dump valve, young man.
Dump valve.

Triple Retard with chocolate sprinkles.
Posted by Grim..., 16:19, 23rd April 2004:
 
For that matter, why is arsepuppy called arsepuppy?


I assumed it meant 'Gay', so he got all stroppy and Cal included it in the FAQ =P

I still think it means Gay, though.
Posted by WarHead, 16:20, 23rd April 2004:
 
I would if I could find it, but I never can.
Posted by arsepuppy, 16:21, 23rd April 2004:
 
www.iamcal.com/about.php?page=3


(fuck you One-Can)
Posted by Brock, 16:21, 23rd April 2004:
 
Grim... You fuckwad.

The Dump valve, by it's mere definition, is not a turbo. It's a......wait for it..... dump valve.

King Retard of the Backward People.
Posted by arsepuppy, 16:23, 23rd April 2004:
 
You tell 'im Brock
Posted by Grim..., 16:24, 23rd April 2004:
 
(fuck you, faggot)
Posted by Brock, 16:24, 23rd April 2004:
 
I would have thought someone so obsessive would actually know what the fuck he was talking about, but hey, takes all sorts.

*shrugs*

;)
Posted by Grim..., 16:27, 23rd April 2004:
 
Um - that's a bit like saying a manifold isn't an exhaust pipe, though, isn't it?

Where the hell do you think a dump valve is?

(Obsessive about what? Cars? Nooooo. I drive a clapped out Peugeot Estate. AP decided that I was obsessed about cars because I knew how a (wait for it) turbocharger worked).
Posted by Brock, 16:31, 23rd April 2004:
 
Are we ready kids? Then I will begin. A turbo consists of 2 fans connected by a common shaft. One is driven by the exhaust gases coming out of the engine, the other compresses (or pumps as an analogy) the air going into the engine at a pressure higher than atmosphere (the charge pressure) to get more air into the engine per combustion cycle, making more efficient use of the cylinder volume within the engine.

The Dump valve is a means of controlling the amount of pressure the turbo can generate in the intake (post turbo) system, and is controlled by the ECU, or a vacuum switch.

A turbo can work perfectly well without a dump valve. They are seperate components.
Posted by arsepuppy, 16:35, 23rd April 2004:
 
But you are obssessed with cars though. You always used to harp on about them and everything.

Having an unexotic car means fuck all.
Posted by Grim..., 16:38, 23rd April 2004:
 
Brock: Um, no.

A dump valve releases air-pressure during gearchange (or any other situation where the revs can drop fast) to make sure the turbocharger doesn't try to force air into an engine that won't need it, because that causes the pressure to drop and creates what's know as 'lag'.

Although 'chargers can work without a dump valve, they work much better with one, and any high-boost (high pressure) turbocharger would damage themselves quite quickly without one.

But saying that, turbochargers do whine as well as hiss, but you can't hear the whine on my Mitsi.

They sure as fuck don't go 'Griiiiiiiiiiiim' though.

AP: So that means you're obsessed with me?
Posted by Brock, 16:38, 23rd April 2004:
 
Just means you're poor. Not sane.

And the dump valve is just a faster acting wastegate, and just speeds up the pressure drop. When you take your foot off the accelerator, the engine decellerates, hence produces less exhaust gas, hence the turbo slows down. The lag is produced because the engine revs rise again once you re-apply power at a greater rate than the turbo due to inertia (both of the turbo and the exhaust gases). If you 'Dump' the back pressure, the turbo doesn't slow down as much relative to the engine when you back off, hence speeds up again faster when the engine accelerates again. Assuming you come back on the power again reasonably quickly, ie in a racing environment. Dump valved on road cars invariably just make a stupid noise and make the matter worse in normal driving, as the flow of exhaust gases doesn't rise rapidly enough for the turbo to have slowed down as much as it would have done anyway.
Posted by WarHead, 16:40, 23rd April 2004:
 
Posted by arsepuppy, 16:41, 23rd April 2004:
 
"AP: So that means you're obsessed with me?"

WTF are you on about, Grim?
Posted by Brock, 16:41, 23rd April 2004:
 
Grim: That doesn't actually argue against me. I didn't specify when the dump valve dumps the boost, merely that it was controlled by the ECU/Vacuum valve.

The use of a dump valve does absolutely NOTHING for the efficiency of a turbo, just the correct use of one gives more useable power delivery in the instance of a car application.

And as for the high pressure ones damaging themselves, that's crap. It may damage the engine and ancillaries if the boost was generated with nowhere for it to go, but it is more likely to stall the impeller than damage the turbo. It would only effect the driveability, or smoothness of power delivery of the engine as a whole.
Posted by Grim..., 16:41, 23rd April 2004:
 
Turbochargers?
Posted by arsepuppy, 16:42, 23rd April 2004:
 
"I drive a clapped out Peugeot Estate."

"but you can't hear the whine on my Mitsi"



....wait a minute.......
Posted by Alfie, 16:42, 23rd April 2004:
 
you are all sad bastards
and coming from me that must really sting
Posted by arsepuppy, 16:43, 23rd April 2004:
 
That coming from Sir Sad Bastardo on table 12.
Posted by Brock, 16:43, 23rd April 2004:
 
*stung*

/bottom lip goes out

I do this shit for a living, though in fairness.
Posted by syl, 16:44, 23rd April 2004:
 
*Whoooooooosh* (all the car/engine stuff) except:

shaft

Mmmmmm. Shaft
Posted by Alfie, 16:45, 23rd April 2004:
 
You lot are so sad, you havent even made it into the restaurant. you are still in the carpark comparing the size of your turbo chargers by slapping each other with your cocks.

and ap is in the restaurant but he is the guy who has to clean the toilets
Posted by Alfie, 16:45, 23rd April 2004:
 
with his tongue
Posted by arsepuppy, 16:47, 23rd April 2004:
 
Nowt wrong with that, you ivory towers cunt ;)
Posted by Grim..., 16:48, 23rd April 2004:
 
AP: My Mitsi is in the fixing shop. Hence I'm driving my Estate. And you talk about me far more that I talk about cars.

Brock: The impeller stalls can and do damage turbochargers. And "a dump valve does absolutely NOTHING for the efficiency of a turbo" but "gives more useable power delivery".

Um...
Posted by Brock, 16:49, 23rd April 2004:
 
It controls the boost. Not the Turbo. That spins anyway.

Key word is efficiency.
Posted by Grim..., 16:50, 23rd April 2004:
 
Oi! Chay!
Brock and I are arguing!

And beside driving cars, drinking Fosters and reading the Sun, arguing is my favoritest thing to do!
Posted by Brock, 16:50, 23rd April 2004:
 
Being wrong seems to be a major hobby, too.

;)
Posted by Grim..., 16:51, 23rd April 2004:
 
But efficency is power, because the faster you can get the turbo up to speed, then the faster you get to a good boost pressure, surely?
Posted by Alfie, 16:51, 23rd April 2004:
 
Oh right, Carry on Bitching at each other
Posted by Grim..., 16:52, 23rd April 2004:
 
If you apply it to that list, then yes it is. :)

Cock Mouth
Posted by WarHead, 16:52, 23rd April 2004:
 
I find I get all the power I need with just a tiny adjustment of the ballcock.
Posted by Grim..., 16:52, 23rd April 2004:
 
Er - being wrong, that is.
Posted by syl, 16:54, 23rd April 2004:
 
Boys, please stop talking about cars, I'm going into a coma
Posted by Grim..., 16:55, 23rd April 2004:
 
Why does adjusting the toilet help your car go faster? =]

What do you drive, anyway?

We could get into a cock-bashing contest about who's is faster (but we'd have to be careful of AP, he'll try to grab them).


=]
Posted by Brock, 16:57, 23rd April 2004:
 
Grim: You are getting too worked up about how it works in a car. And a petrol one at that. That is not the be all and end all.

Efficiency is the amount of boost that the turbo can generate given the volume and speed of the exhaust side of the turbo. Power is as much affected by the quantity of your intercooling, as compressed gases are by their very nature heated, producing less efficient combustion. The useability of the power that the turbo helps provide is increased by a well mapped dump valve or wastegate, that's all. You get the power when you most want it.
Posted by Grim..., 16:58, 23rd April 2004:
 
Syl, Brock and I are going to start arguing about who's car is fastest - his 1.4 Peugeot GTi or my 1.4 Nova SRi!

This is important =]

(You could just, you know, not read?)
Posted by Grim..., 16:59, 23rd April 2004:
 
Brock: Not worked up - in my head I'm discussing quietly over a beer with a fellow (and rare) enthusiast (or obsessive, as IAmCal's answer to Graham Norton would call it).

I still want to hear about your GTi =]
Posted by arsepuppy, 17:00, 23rd April 2004:
 
"or my 1.4 Nova SRi!"

Didn't you have a Peugeot Estate a bit ago?
Posted by syl, 17:00, 23rd April 2004:
 
Guess so...I hate it when cars usurp the attention I am receiving

;)
Posted by Grim..., 17:01, 23rd April 2004:
 
Didn't you have a Peugeot Estate a bit ago?


*whoooooooooooooooosh*
Posted by WarHead, 17:01, 23rd April 2004:
 
Meet me behind the garage then, darlin' and you can play with me stick shift.
Posted by Grim..., 17:02, 23rd April 2004:
 
Syl: Pfft - cars are never more important than women =]
Posted by Brock, 17:02, 23rd April 2004:
 
I have a car with a Hooooge Engine, and no turbo.

I do however design and build an aircraft engine with a turbo AND a supercharger, but with no dump valve or waste gate...
Posted by WarHead, 17:02, 23rd April 2004:
 
You lying get, Grim.
Posted by syl, 17:02, 23rd April 2004:
 
Besides, neither of those freekin' rattle-traps can compete with my BMW. So eat my dust.

:)
Posted by Grim..., 17:03, 23rd April 2004:
 
Although it's much easier to change something on a car and get the results you wanted than it is with a woman =]
Posted by arsepuppy, 17:04, 23rd April 2004:
 
It's not really a *whoosh* if only two people on the thread get the joke, is it?
Posted by Grim..., 17:05, 23rd April 2004:
 
What car?
What planes, for that matter?
Are the two 'chargers seperate units, because if you've got a supercharger that surely the turbocharger is pretty redundent?

And there wouldn't be much call for a dump valve on a plane, I agree =]
Posted by WarHead, 17:05, 23rd April 2004:
 
I'm going home now.

On the bus.

Eat my diesel fumes. And chip wrappers. And discarded copies of the Metro News that the school kids have ripped up as a wizard wheeze.
Posted by syl, 17:05, 23rd April 2004:
 
"Syl: Pfft - cars are never more important than women =]"

oh there is a god to thank...

(what's Pfft)
Posted by arsepuppy, 17:05, 23rd April 2004:
 
But women tend to taste like brake fluid during 'rag week'.
Posted by Alfie, 17:05, 23rd April 2004:
 
BF ∝ T

Where T = Talk of cars and turbo chargers and BF = Boredom Factor
Posted by Grim..., 17:06, 23rd April 2004:
 
AP: Yes.
Syl: BMW? Pah. Heavy lumps of overrated aluminium with underpowered engines (unless you've got a good one, of course).
Posted by Grim..., 17:06, 23rd April 2004:
 
^%&^%^$£&^%
Posted by Alfie, 17:08, 23rd April 2004:
 
Sorry the BF is one term (Boredom Factor) maybe should have just called it B
Posted by WarHead, 17:08, 23rd April 2004:
 
Why does adjusting the toilet help your car go faster? =]

What do you drive, anyway?


Car? I was talking about power, not cars, and in this case the power to dislodge a log with a single flush.

What I drive mostly, is my wife, mad.
Posted by syl, 17:08, 23rd April 2004:
 
"But women tend to taste like brake fluid during 'rag week'."

hahahahahahaha!
Posted by Grim..., 17:08, 23rd April 2004:
 
AP (again): Please don't tell me that you've drunk either of those things =[
Posted by arsepuppy, 17:10, 23rd April 2004:
 
It's more of a 'battery acid' taste, but that wouldn't work in the context of this thread.
Posted by WarHead, 17:11, 23rd April 2004:
 
Anyone want to follow on from "Rosenkranz"?
Posted by syl, 17:12, 23rd April 2004:
 
"It's more of a 'battery acid' taste, but that wouldn't work in the context of this thread."

Gross AP.
Posted by WarHead, 17:12, 23rd April 2004:
 
Syl, 'pfft' is just an expression of exasperation, a kind of abbreviated 'WGASA.' Except that WGASSA is itself an abbreviation of 'Who Gives A Shit Anyway.'
Posted by Grim..., 17:13, 23rd April 2004:
 
AP: Could have said 'Car battery acid'.
WH: I want to hear about Brock's 'plane.
AP (just twigged): ARGH! GOD NO!
Posted by syl, 17:13, 23rd April 2004:
 
OK, Rosenkrantz...um...

Claire Danes
Posted by arsepuppy, 17:13, 23rd April 2004:
 
'Rosenkranz' and 'Mallet'.... it's like a sandwich of mispelling.

(In that context, it's spelt 'Mallett')
Posted by arsepuppy, 17:14, 23rd April 2004:
 
Dammit, I forgot about car battteries :(
Posted by WarHead, 17:16, 23rd April 2004:
 
Well forget about elephants as well.



......See, you can't, can you?
Posted by syl, 17:16, 23rd April 2004:
 
How do you spell it then?
Posted by syl, 17:17, 23rd April 2004:
 
And you spelt Guildenstern wrong. That much I DO know...
Posted by WarHead, 17:17, 23rd April 2004:
 
Does it really matter how one spells Mallit??
Posted by arsepuppy, 17:18, 23rd April 2004:
 
Hairy muff, you win.
Posted by syl, 17:19, 23rd April 2004:
 
I wouldn't call Brock that if I were you
Posted by WarHead, 17:21, 23rd April 2004:
 
Right - I really am orf now. Later, dudes.


'specially you, Syl ;0)
Posted by Grim..., 17:22, 23rd April 2004:
 
Ooh! This thread has just reminded me of a B3ta post I made...

/Digs...
Posted by syl, 17:22, 23rd April 2004:
 
Bye. I'm off too. Have a good weekend everyone.
Posted by Grim..., 17:23, 23rd April 2004:
 
Posted by Sul, 17:27, 23rd April 2004:
 
Been pushing photoshop to the limit I see ;)
Posted by Grim..., 17:28, 23rd April 2004:
 
No - it's my m4d M$ paint skillz!

And Blue Peter always told me that it was ideas that were important, not skill. =]
Posted by Sul, 17:32, 23rd April 2004:
 
And my mum always said it was the thought that counts but that didnt stop her spitting in my dinner for 10 years after I got her a shit birthday present.
Posted by Sul, 17:41, 23rd April 2004:
 
only teasing innit
Posted by Brock, 18:24, 23rd April 2004:
 
Grim: Let's tidy this one up once and for all.

Turbochargers and Superchargers can never be the same unit by definition. Superchargers are belt, shaft or gear driven and rotate at a fixed proportional speed to the engine. Turbochargers are driven by exhaust gas, and their speed is purely dependant on exhaust gas speed and volume and so not in any way proportional to engine speed.

Our Engine is a 2-stroke Diesel-cycle engine running on Jet-A1 (like the big planes run on) rather than petrol. The supercharger is needed for low RPM (ie starting and up to 1400 ish rpm) when the turbo is mostly inefficient. A 2 stroke requires combustion scavenging to start, and the turbo can't do this as it's going too slow. The turbo then takes over the majority of the boost supply requirements up to its 2750rpm max speed, and 120Hp. All from 1.8cc and 100 kg total weight.

read about the engine here, if anyone cares in the slightest.

I am fully aware that the website is shit, btw, I am trying to get them to free up money to sort it out!

Do NOT send us an e-mail that the Production Manager spends too much time on the web talking shite. Thanks.

As for the car, I'm with Syl on this one - BMW 535i Sport. Underpowered? Kiss my chutney ferret, max power boy, I think not!

Ok. BORED of being sensible now. E-mail if you want me to beat you up further over technical issues. This place is for talking about less technical, and wholly more entertaining, things.

NEXT!
Posted by Perclissigi, 01:02, 24th April 2004:
 
For Grim...:
Efficency
n. pl. ef·fi·cien·cies

1.
a. The ratio of the effective or useful output to the total input in any system.
b. The ratio of the energy delivered by a machine to the energy supplied for its
operation.

power
n.
1. The energy or motive force by which a physical system or machine is operated: turbines turned
by steam power; a sailing ship driven by wind power.
2. The capacity of a system or machine to operate: a vehicle that runs under its own power.

Not really the same thing.

"And beside driving cars, drinking Fosters and reading the Sun, arguing is my favoritest thing to do!"
Fosters is pisswater
The Sun.... don't get me started. (Let's just say I wouldn't wipe my arse with that paper, let alone read the thing)
Arguing - Pointless (esp. on here)
Posted by WarHead, 16:56, 24th April 2004:
 
Now THAT is how you kill a thread.
Posted by Perclissigi, 16:58, 24th April 2004:
 
:D
I was in a bitchy mood last nite.
So, I apologise to Grim...
Apart from the Sun and Fosters comments, I stand by them.
Posted by Brock, 17:01, 24th April 2004:
 
No, no, no, no!!!!! Have I taught you nothing!!???!!!1111111oneoneone

NEVER apologise, unless you were a, totally in the wrong (you weren't), and/or b, they are holding a sharp and/or blunt (but exploding) object up to your neck.

Nancy.
Posted by Perclissigi, 17:04, 24th April 2004:
 
Scratch that comment...
Posted by Brock, 17:07, 24th April 2004:
 
Perci: "Nancy Boy was MY song" (pre edit)

Sung to you by 'Derek', your Dom partner, as he sweated over your arse cheeks?

too late to scratch it!
Posted by WarHead, 17:07, 24th April 2004:
 
Unless you're ME. I'm good at apologising, me.

Let me illustrate.

I'm sorry you're a load of tossing loosers and have nothing better to do of a Saturday tea time but log in here.

See?
Posted by Hanni, 17:12, 24th April 2004:
 
Hey, what was this?
Posted by Perclissigi, 17:12, 24th April 2004:
 
WH: Even pre-comment, for example, "Love you to bits, but, fuck off."
Brock: No, sorry, the whole man-sex thing just doesn't do it for me. I know you're dissapointed, and I'm flattered, really, but no.
Uber Wankstain
Posted by WarHead, 17:16, 24th April 2004:
 
I'm a complex character, live with it.
Posted by Perclissigi, 17:18, 24th April 2004:
 
Wasn't complaining at all. Quite a pleasant surprise actually.
Posted by Doctor Lucid, 17:20, 24th April 2004:
 
MY god. o.
Posted by WarHead, 17:20, 24th April 2004:
 
I wouldn't tell anyone to fuck off unless they were a friend. Non-friends seem to take umbrage. And your teeth.
Posted by Perclissigi, 17:26, 24th April 2004:
 
Yeay, I get that.
I've only ever told someone who wasn't my friend to fuck off.
He was a PROPER cunt though.
Just thinking about the fucker makes my blood boil.
Posted by WarHead, 17:26, 24th April 2004:
 
That must be quite uncomfortable.
Posted by Perclissigi, 17:27, 24th April 2004:
 
You have NO idea.
Posted by WarHead, 17:28, 24th April 2004:
 
True.

Anyroadup, I'm off home now. (Been working o/t AGAIN). Maybe see you in here later.
Posted by Perclissigi, 17:30, 24th April 2004:
 
Cool, I'll be around. I'm doing my arty/music thang tonight so i'm not going anywhere.
Unless I'm rendering something.
Posted by WarHead, 17:32, 24th April 2004:
 
You work in an abatoir TOO?
Posted by Alfie, 17:53, 24th April 2004:
 
haha
Posted by Grim..., 09:08, 26th April 2004:
 
Perclissigi: It was Brock talking about efficiency and power, and the sun / fosters / whatever else was a joke.
You read some of the thread, yeah?

Brock: My Mitsi has two supercharger / turbocharger hybrids on it - they are getting quite common.
Posted by Brock, 09:26, 26th April 2004:
 
Hybrids are more turbo than supercharger, though. And only really use the concept of a driven shaft electrically, as far as I am aware. They are more of a powered turbo than a true mix of the 2. Nice idea though. Won't be as popular though, cos they won't need to fit a dump valve that goes *whoosh* in the way that makes all the max power sad twats cream their pants.
Posted by Grim..., 10:53, 26th April 2004:
 
It's got an electronic dump valve for when you're not running at full boost.

The 'supercharger' is connected via an electronic clutch and is, as you said, only used at low revs, and only if you've got it turned on to sports mode in the car.

However, one of the turbo's is only generating half the pressure of the other one, and that's why the car is back at RalliArt =[
Posted by Abe Frohman, 18:50, 26th April 2004:
 
This thread makes me feel all warm and fuzzy.
Posted by Andy, 18:54, 26th April 2004:
 
Would it be possible to call a super/turbocharger hybrid an ultracharger or something? That would certainly boost (spot the pun) sales of them amongst the Max Power masssiiivvveee.
Posted by Abe Frohman, 18:56, 26th April 2004:
 
I see the pun!

*Demands Medal*
Posted by Brock, 18:57, 26th April 2004:
 
It's all a bit american and would entail talking to the cock-suckers, so I for one shall be doing no such thing.
Posted by Brock, 18:58, 26th April 2004:
 
/picks up big medal with sharp edges

/twats Abe in the face with it, narrowly missing two of his chins
Posted by Perclissigi, 19:01, 26th April 2004:
 
Grim... " But efficency is power..."
???
Posted by Perclissigi, 19:06, 26th April 2004:
 
Is it just me, or is there a lot of negativity flying around at the mo?
Posted by Brock, 19:09, 26th April 2004:
 
No. I'm positive I wanted to twat Abe in the (fat) face with a medal.

:D
Posted by Perclissigi, 19:10, 26th April 2004:
 
Nice one.
A little contact sport is never a bad thing.
Posted by Andy, 19:16, 26th April 2004:
 
I thought knowledge was power. Does that make efficiency=knowledge?
Posted by Perclissigi, 19:20, 26th April 2004:
 
I had a similar thought the other day.
Is soup a drink or food?
If it's food, then surely orange juice is just cold orange soup?
Posted by Andy, 19:23, 26th April 2004:
 
Jaffa cake - cake or biscuit?
The name suggests cake, as does the spongy base.
However, it is sold alongside biscuits and comes in a long packet of the same size.

Soup with bits in is food, smooth soup is a drink.
Posted by Abe Frohman, 19:29, 26th April 2004:
 
Looks like Brock was quick enough to duck the medal and merely let it slice away all of his hair.

The baldy Turkey-visitor
Posted by Perclissigi, 19:31, 26th April 2004:
 
I've actually heard many a good thing about Turkey. Presuming you mean the country.
Althought the idea that Brock "Visits" turkeys all together more entertaining.
Posted by Brock, 19:34, 26th April 2004:
 
Another subtle joke 12-Bore shotgun'd by the king of sleight of hand...

*BABOOOM!!!11111*

Nice one Perc.
Posted by Andy, 19:36, 26th April 2004:
 
They'd think christmas had come early, but then again that's probably not a good thing for turkeys. Brock could be like Father Christmas with his giant sack coming once a year.
Posted by Brock, 19:37, 26th April 2004:
 
Oi! New boy!

Watch your step, fuckface, or you'll be screaming "Bernard Matthews!!" every time you sit down after I've rammed your computer up your arse.
Posted by Andy, 19:40, 26th April 2004:
 
Sorry, I just couldn't resist the christmas jokes.
Posted by Perclissigi, 19:42, 26th April 2004:
 
Oi, leave it out brock!
Andy: Don't be tempted by the dark side, join me in my quest!
(That is, to prove that there is nout wrong with being a little slow sometimes)
Posted by Brock, 19:43, 26th April 2004:
 
Andy: Hah! Instant apology!!

You are Brock's bitch! Kiss my toe cheese, you mother!!

Now go and wash my mouldy pants.
Posted by Andy, 19:45, 26th April 2004:
 
I didn't realise I was being slow, I just thought I had a shite sense of humour.
To prove my point I was very tempted to leave my reply for an hour or so to illustrate my lateness.
Posted by Andy, 19:47, 26th April 2004:
 
I'd like to point out I'm leaving now to go and make my tea (dinner, not the drink), not because I'm a wussy ponce.
*Makes rude gesture behind Brock's back and runs away squealing*
Posted by Perclissigi, 19:49, 26th April 2004:
 
No, I wasn't calling you slow, agh... never mind.
I'm also off too, as I have a social life.
Well, quiet night in with PS2, best buddies and beer.
And mixed pastries, of all the things! TTFN
Posted by Uncle Moc, 20:04, 26th April 2004:
 
There actually was a court case to prove that Jaffa Cakes are in fact cakes, and not biscuits. - FACT.
Posted by WarHead, 20:34, 26th April 2004:
 
WGASA - just eat the fucking thing.
Posted by Alfie, 20:47, 26th April 2004:
 
I think the Jaffa Cake thing worked that cakes go stale and hard when left out, biscuits go soft. Jaffa Cakes go hard therefore they are definately cakes.
Posted by Sul, 20:54, 26th April 2004:
 
Of course they're cakes. Any doubters are idjits of the highest order.
Posted by figroll, 21:37, 26th April 2004:
 
I must be a cake then. I go hard when left out too.
Hi Brock.I see you are being your ever pleasant self to everyone.
Posted by Brock, 23:34, 26th April 2004:
 
Fuck you, you rancid pissflap.





hello, mate!
Posted by su, 10:31, 3rd May 2004:
 
hate
Posted by syl, 10:57, 3rd May 2004:
 
heat
Posted by Kallese, 16:15, 3rd May 2004:
 
spayed
Posted by Brock, 16:16, 3rd May 2004:
 
Where the hell did the women-folk get the word association bug from?

GET BACK IN THE KITCHEN, THE LOT OF YOU!
Posted by su, 16:18, 3rd May 2004:
 
silence slave boy and fix me breakfast
Posted by syl, 16:20, 3rd May 2004:
 
and don't burn the toast again!
Posted by Brock, 16:21, 3rd May 2004:
 
I burnt the cornflakes, last time.

:(

And don't cheek me, either of you... Or I will send you back to the Mill and chain you to your loom.
Posted by syl, 16:24, 3rd May 2004:
 
*oooh*
Posted by su, 16:26, 3rd May 2004:
 
when you return from taking syl to the mill can you please remember to wipe your feet before you come in, last time you trod dirt over the carpet
Posted by Brock, 16:33, 3rd May 2004:
 
You just want me to get rid of her first, so you can *ahem* negotiate an altogether stickier fate...

You keep telling me that you're not a slut, and then you keep throwing yourself at me. It's embarrassing, woman. no wonder men worry about mixed signals...

;)
Posted by syl, 16:35, 3rd May 2004:
 
i want you badly
Posted by Brock, 16:37, 3rd May 2004:
 
What. Like rolling around naked, poking each other in the eye, elbowing each other and apologising breathlessly?
Posted by su, 16:38, 3rd May 2004:
 
you can have him
Posted by syl, 16:38, 3rd May 2004:
 
yeah...that'll do.
Posted by Brock, 16:40, 3rd May 2004:
 
Su, you sure know how to reject with style, eh?

Don't fight it love, you know you're not strong enough to resist me. You find my abject humility and modesty deeply pant-wetting and no mistake.

you know it...
Posted by su, 16:46, 3rd May 2004:
 
yes and i also think lawn bowls is a riveting sport
Posted by Brock, 16:47, 3rd May 2004:
 
Whatever floats your boat, baby.

freak
Posted by syl, 16:48, 3rd May 2004:
 
First one to resort to name-calling : Brock
Posted by Brock, 16:51, 3rd May 2004:
 
Yeah, but she started it.

/pouts
Posted by syl, 16:55, 3rd May 2004:
 
You ignited the feminist ire by telling us to get back in the kitchen!
/bashes Brock over the head with her rolling pin (i hope that's a kitchen utensil or i will be red-faced)
Posted by su, 16:56, 3rd May 2004:
 
actually wee man i believe you began this round
Posted by Brock, 16:57, 3rd May 2004:
 
Yeah, but I was going to suggest frantically coupling over the kitchen table, and making a nice sandwich while the lady in question came down from heaven, panting slightly.

You DO jump to conclusions, don't you.

Su: Maybe. Not prepared to admit anything without a lawyer.
Posted by syl, 16:59, 3rd May 2004:
 
"Yeah, but I was going to suggest frantically coupling over the kitchen table"

oh that's alright then...
Posted by Brock, 17:00, 3rd May 2004:
 
You and your principles. You get all on your high horse, but the moment you think you might get a glimpse of a bit of cock, you back straight down again...
Posted by syl, 17:01, 3rd May 2004:
 
damn straight

Cockles
Posted by Brock, 17:02, 3rd May 2004:
 
Well. It's got a slight curve back in toward my stomach, but it's pretty straight apart from that.
Posted by syl, 17:04, 3rd May 2004:
 
Shit. You're just a tease.
Posted by syl, 17:04, 3rd May 2004:
 
Ouch!
Posted by Kallese, 21:49, 3rd May 2004:
 
fallen
Posted by WarHead, 22:52, 3rd May 2004:
 
angel
Posted by Sul, 23:06, 3rd May 2004:
 
Lucifer
Posted by Brock, 23:44, 3rd May 2004:
 
Fallen tree

(loose fir. Ahem)
Posted by su, 00:24, 4th May 2004:
 
silence
Posted by WarHead, 20:24, 4th May 2004:
 
library
Posted by Brock, 20:36, 4th May 2004:
 
bored.

(double meaning intended)
Posted by WarHead, 20:40, 4th May 2004:
 
rubber
Posted by Brock, 20:44, 4th May 2004:
 
blob
Posted by WarHead, 20:47, 4th May 2004:
 
shop
Posted by Brock, 21:14, 4th May 2004:
 
For Alfie:

"photo"
Posted by WarHead, 21:15, 4th May 2004:
 
shoot
Posted by Brock, 21:17, 4th May 2004:
 
Ah. Fuck it.

I declare the bastard union between Jesse and Richard Tham!!!111, with all the resulting little apathetic offspring.

*sigh*

New game, please.
Posted by WarHead, 21:20, 4th May 2004:
 
I-Spy?
Posted by Brock, 21:24, 4th May 2004:
 
That should go down a STORM over the internet...

/foresees longest thread in iamcal history.
Posted by WarHead, 21:29, 4th May 2004:
 
Precisely. Internet games for dummies.
Posted by WarHead, 21:40, 4th May 2004:
 
I spy, with my little eye, something beginning with 'C.'
Posted by Brock, 21:46, 4th May 2004:
 
Cunt

(Sul just logged on)
Posted by WarHead, 22:39, 4th May 2004:
 
No.

Gessagen.
Posted by Sul, 23:01, 4th May 2004:
 
Well I was saving this one for a better time but:



Yeah, even Santa thinks you're a cunt... you cunt.
Posted by WarHead, 23:34, 4th May 2004:
 
Stop it. Just stop it and play nicely.
Posted by Perclissigi, 23:58, 4th May 2004:
 
COUGH cunt AHEM
Posted by Brock, 00:17, 5th May 2004:
 
/me flicks the bird at Sul nonchalently, not caring for his badly focussed opinion. Not one jot.

Ya big eared freak.



Sul at work...
Posted by Sul, 00:35, 5th May 2004:
 
HAHAHA The joke's on you, I have a much bigger nose.