iamcal.com Since May 2000

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• Hello!

I am trying to get with this guy, how would you ask him out?

By the power of the spoken word, in my opinion.

I reckon that all that sign language, morse code and semaphore stuff is more miss than hit, really.

Best sticking to the traditional stuff, I think. Or just flash him your tits. That'd work on me.

But then, I always have been a classy bastard.

All though you need to be wary about him laughing in your face and all of your friends smirking about your stupidity and talking behind your back.

Good luck.

just ask
anything else and he'll never get it, guys are not so good with the subtle hints - or have you learnt nothing from this site ;)

But let's face it, if you tell him you fancy him and you had any sort of chance, you're in there.

That's the thing about blokes. No grey area's. Drop a (not overly) subtle hint that you fancy him, and wait for him to come to you. But be aware, he'll think you don't mean it the first time, because men have been conditioned over the years to expect to have to crawl naked over broken glass to get a girl to like them. That seems to be what you lot want from us.

Why do we have to have all the risk?

Bah humbug!

Ooooh. She sneaked in with the same point from a female point of view.

That was just damn sneaky.

nah you are just slow
and stop copying me

Kaila, what exactly do you mean by 'get with?'

Get down with...

Get nekkid with...

Get jiggy with...

Get on the good foot...

Get down and nasty...

SHE WANTS TO FUCK HIM!!!!

Sheesh. I didn't think that particular euphamism was completely inaccessible.

;)

not exactly.

OOOOh, I forgot. We are from different countries, "get with" means: chill with, hang out, go out, date. So here, as to what Brock was refering to, If i wanted to get fucked I say tap. I wanna tap him, or get tapped by him or anything of the like.

tapping? makes me think of magic: the gathering. somewhat the opposite to sex ;)

you don't think sex is magical? even if it is just sex?

You are asking advice on how to ask a 'guy' out, how the fuck would you know if sex is magical?

Wait a min, are you a 'guy' yourself? are you asking for homosexual dating protocol?, if so, Brock's definitely your man.

also i think cal's referring to LARP (i could be wrong) but, well once you've seen some of the people who do LARP, you'll see what he means

No, Cal's referring to Magic: the gathering.
Although I don't know what tapping is.

you sing 'taps' at the end of girl guides and scouts

Really?
How does it go?

ah well it's still nerdy. thus not sexy :)

actually i can't remember, and neither can my friends from guides
but we did have to do the gird guide salute the whole time
and i remember it being somthing serious, thus we all competed to sing the most out of tune
i always won.

No I am not a guy. I have never asked a guy out before and I need advice. Besides, can't you read?!!? I am asking for the girls advice not the guys. I am surprised none of you haven't told me to just jump on him and that would be the signal for him to know I like him. I also can't believe none of you have heard of tapping.

Ah, i get it now. Can you feel the magic? Shazam.

"Or just flash him your tits. That'd work on me"

Who hasn't said to just jump on him?

Course it'd work. How old are you, and how old is he, for reference?

oh, also looking him directly in the eye with a playful grin, then licking your fingers and rubbing your nipple whilst simultaneously closing your eyes and moaning also gets the message across that you like him. Assuming you wanted to be reet classy, that is.

we havent heard of tapping because it's evidently an american phrase and you may have noticed that a large majority of people here aren't american.

why can't you just tell him you like him? it's not hard. as pointed out, men are stupid, takes them a while to work out what's going on. however men have easily inflated egos, be careful.. don't be too overkeen or it'll go to his head..

*waits for brock to make lame pun about heads*

Anyway, you addressed your question to the "ladies". That's why only blokes replied. No ladies here...

/runs and ducks from the inevitable abuse.

I've heard of tapping. But only in the context of in a 13-16 year old age group reference for getting off with girls. It was used extensively in the Great Yarmouth area of youth.

there was one lady, then brock had a sex change..

I can show you the purchase order for the 8 inch cock, if you want...

Brock: i am a bloke?
you think i am a bloke?

fucker!

No. Just not a lady...

Hehehe. It was a "no classy women here" gag, for the slow ones among you.

:p

more class in my pinky finger than you'll ever experience in your whole life mr

*yawn*

"No ladies here..."

AHEM!

kaila, I have found it depends on age. When you get to my age, you realise that time is of the essence and you have to resort to being unfemininely direct. Very unladylike, I know, but Brock, how about it old fellow?

rather than being "blunt", think of it as being explicit. e.g. "hey, it'd be fun to hang with you, i reckon -- wanna go, i dunno, the mall or something on sunday arvo?" and yeah, repeat it. girls' "subtle hints" are not picked up because they forget that they throw millions of exactly the same cues and behaviours constantly, and that it's only them that knows that this particular one is imbued with meaning whereas all the others were "just normal conversation". to put it another way: the constant stream of "subtle hints" gets very quickly (ie by about age 15) discounted as not being worth paying detailed attention to, since nearly all of it is not actually hints, just behaviour, so if you want something to stand out, you have to make it stand out/be clearly worthy of paying attention to.

I'm not gonna cook it, but i'll order it from Zanzibar.

I am 21 and he, truthfully, is 32

ok well if by 32 he hasn't developed spine enough to ask you out.
don't waste your time.

tee hee.

magic: the gathering is a card game, with creatures and spells and stuff.

'tapping' is used in the contect of tapping a resource. when you cast a spell / use a creature, that requires resources (known as mana), and once a resource is tapped, that means it is currently being used by a creature. (Tapped mana is usually turned 90 degrees).


He describes it as the opposite to sex because it is a geek game, and if i understand correctly, he is implying that the people who play such games generally don't experience sex with another consenting human.

I like the way you felt the need to clarify that they don't have sex with a consenting human. Funny, but also slightly disturbing!

that's an oblique reference to cal's other site: iamnotcalofficerijusthappentolooklikehimandanywayshewasaskingforit.com

lots of interesting threads on THOSE forums, i can tell you

adam's right, of course

LARPing is, of course, much much worse ;)

brock: you can switch the emphasis too:

sex with another consenting human
sex with another consenting human
sex with another consenting human

=D

Like "tap dat ass"? Flav is in da hayouse!

www.joel.net/EBONICS/translator.asp is about as reliable as babelfish probably, for what it's worth.

Yeah, you live in different countries? Dude, that's heavy. Maybe you could agree to meet at the mid point between the two (unless it's Coventry or something), go catch a movie, have a couple of fine ales, and then invite him back to your place for a "coffee". Once you've both got over the Jet Lag, it's going to be a match made in heaven.

Man, that would be cool, if you got a box of matches, and each one was a match made in heaven, and it said on the side "Made in heaven". It's when I have ideas like that, that I begin to wish I owned a match company so I could more easily do it.

"Man, that would be cool, if you got a box of matches, and each one was a match made in heaven, and it said on the side "Made in heaven". It's when I have ideas like that, that I begin to wish I owned a match company so I could more easily do it."

I love you Moc.

That needs to be a potatoshop image, surely Alfie?

Could you do one in Moc's honour?

Actually Alfie, how easy is it to make a picture with someone like Richard Branson or Pierce Brosnan or Nick Faldo swimming with dolphins and a couple of kids dressed in green?

hehehe

can anyone explain that one to me?

i'm with cal. the subtile references escape me

Me too. :(

It's so subtle, that I think Syl is bluffing. She's normally pretty dense, after all.

i've got a full house. do you think i can beat syl?

Well, it's not up to me, but i'd give you both permission and a big stick.

/passes Abe some nails for the end

I've been trying to figure the reference out also but I fear we all may have been duped by another doc "there's a punchline there... I'm sure there is... isnt there?" post.

"She's normally pretty dense, after all".

It appears I am.

And also in good company.

I prefered Bad Company. They rocked!

But all too briefly.