Discussion » Meditation

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Posted by Sul, 14:47, 18th August 2004:
 
I went all hippy yesterday and bought a meditation/hypnotic relaxation CD thing. It's meant to help you relax and free up your mind and shit. So I thought I'd give it a go.

So I'm lying there, walkman on, listening to this guy attempting to take me into a trance state. "Deeper deeper" and I try not to think about porn. I'm imagining I'm walking down these steps from 10 - 1 as he was saying. Heading for this "almost magical" garden and when I got to 1 I really did feel a rush of relaxation. Then he starts describing the garden but my imagination starts running wild and I spoil it by sticking a bouncy castle and a lion chasing a gazelle in it. I've tried 3 more times now and all the time I cant stop thinking about the fucking bouncy castle as I'm walking down the marble stairs.
Posted by Miki, 15:01, 18th August 2004:
 
hehehehe I've made those tapes ages ago, if I ever do it again I'll put in a bouncy castle :D
Posted by Foghorn Leghorn, 15:09, 18th August 2004:
 
You made them Miki? KEWL!!!
Posted by Miki, 15:18, 18th August 2004:
 
in a previous life I was briefly a psychologist
Posted by Sul, 15:41, 18th August 2004:
 
Oh yeah I forgot about that. Any tips for when I try it again?
Posted by Miki, 15:43, 18th August 2004:
 
best tip I can give you, make your own
use the cd you have for it's structure but make your own version with things that make you relax, you know: bouncy castles, Stella etc
Posted by Foghorn Leghorn, 16:44, 18th August 2004:
 
sniffing girls pants...looking a breasts...etc etc
Posted by chris, 16:46, 18th August 2004:
 
shaving your head...etc etc ;)
Posted by WarHead, 16:50, 18th August 2004:
 
Foggy, you're thinking of MASTURBATION, not MEDITATION. An easy mistake to make, I know.
Posted by su, 23:39, 18th August 2004:
 
maybe you could get miki to make a tape for you Sul?
I have a lovely colletion made just for me, 6 tapes each varying from 5-20 minutes

most of the ones you buy are like 30 minutes or longer, who wants to waste that much time realxing ;)
Posted by WarHead, 09:01, 19th August 2004:
 
I think Roy Castle said it best when he said,
"Meditation,
meditation,
meditation - that's what you need
If you wanna be the best
If you wanne beat the rest
meditation's what you need.

This was when he was still alive, of course.
Posted by Victor Menendez, 09:56, 19th August 2004:
 
That's bollocks Roy Castle sang 'Twenty Regal King-Size, That's what you need'
Posted by Saltation, 11:45, 19th August 2004:
 
"i can't burn a whole half hour relaxing!!!! I need to relax and i need to relax NOW!!"
Posted by Saltation, 22:49, 19th August 2004:
 
sadly, i spent several years where this was literally true...
Posted by WarHead, 09:19, 20th August 2004:
 
Then you should try masturbation rather than meditation.
Posted by su, 11:55, 20th August 2004:
 
and if you are busy
Brock will service you for a small fee ;)
Posted by Brock, 11:58, 20th August 2004:
 
Nope. I only wank myself off, thanks. Oh, and women. Although that particular branch of the service is a little underused at the moment.

I have spare capacity, ladies!!!111 (so to speak). Roll up, roll up! Get your bargain basement (top quality and value, though) zero effort masturbation here!!

Satisfaction guaranteed. Or at the very least, I might care a little bit if it's not up to my normal deliciously floating result...

(*&^&)(^&(*^&*^*)(
Posted by Kitty, 12:10, 20th August 2004:
 
Scratch? yipes sounds like a painful masturbation technique. Not going to recommend you to my sister!
Posted by Brock, 12:12, 20th August 2004:
 
Better?

My e-mail address is on my profile, by the way...

;)
Posted by Saltation, 12:13, 20th August 2004:
 
lol. i can just see a section in Tower Records or HMV: "Masturbation CDs" 'oh that's a bit expensive, i might just try a single first, see how i like it'
Posted by su, 12:25, 20th August 2004:
 
it's called prince's lastest album
Posted by Kitty, 12:54, 20th August 2004:
 
Hmm that's loads better, would nearly even try myself ;)
Posted by su, 13:08, 20th August 2004:
 
Score 1 to the bald man
Posted by Kitty, 13:35, 20th August 2004:
 
lol
Posted by Brock, 14:21, 20th August 2004:
 
/furiously tries to think of a way to remove the "nearly" in Kitty's post.

Apart from getting Cal to edit it out, obviously.

:)