iamcal.com Since May 2000

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• Hello!

Since I started my new job recently, I've picked up a few annoying habits, one of which came up with my little 'where the watch hands should be in a photo' mini rant. However, the latest one is a bit worse...

At the moment, I have to reshoot the whole range of watches (possibly around 900), then retouch and tidy up the images when needed, AND THEN path out the watches in Photoshop to eliminate the unnecessary backgrounds so that the watches can be placed over any background. Thing is, some of these watches can prove a little tricky to path out due to awkward little quirks in the design.

And now, getting to the actual point...

Since having to do all this, I've been known to look at complex patterns and such in real life (trees, chainlink fences, grass, crazy hairdos) and say to random people (as if they would know), "See that there mate? Yeah, those trees! Don't you think they'd be a cunt to path out?"

Rather predictably, they have nay an idea as to what I'm on about. Anyone else done this kind of thing?

I used to get nick to cut out pictures of children and animals for the books i was working on.. now whenever he sees a particularly fluffy animal or a child with messy hair he comments on what a bastard they'd be to cut out.

and after a particularly hefty week of photoshopping ugly babies i found myself looking in the mirror thinking i could use the healing tool to get rid of the bags under my eyes...

but now i'm unemployed i just wonder round sainsburys looking gormless...

I wait till it's a nice day with a clear blue sky before I mentally cut trees out. So much easier :)

i remember the first time I looked up at a blue sky with white fluffy clouds and though "that's a windows 95 sky, that is"

I felt physically sick and repulsed at what I had become :(

if you have the opportunity to re-shoot, it can be a good idea to shoot on a plain and oddly coloured background. then simply knock out that colour and autopath / trim to the remainder. let the machine do the work. it's got nothing better to do.

ooh good tip, would never have thought of trying to shoot against, say, a blue screen.

I always end up answering my cell phone or home phone as though I am at work. "AT&T Gov't Solutions, Desirae speaking". My honey gets a kick out of this.

He's a weirdo then, if that's all it takes to get him off...

And how do you pronounce the apostrophe? With a glutton stop, or perhaps with a short pause?

brock also sometimes answers the phone as if he's still at work..

"good evening, auntie brock's house of pain, and what can i do for you you naughty boy??"

That was between me and you, Jeff. I was playing up to your fantasy anyway. So to beat me up about it is a little mean.

You look super scrumpable in that hat by the way, Jeff...

;)

thats because i photoshopped out all my spots and the huge bags under my eyes.

*hits brock with a big plank of wood full of nails*

/me still gets the horn

get out more saddo

alfie: the "re-shoot" reference sorta flagged it for arsepuppy, not yourself. just because it's an old technique doesn't mean everyone automatically knows it.

I know that technique, Salty, I used to use it a lot. But for more professional looking results, you really have to do it the slow way. It's 'jagged pixel holiday on ice' otherwise.

Brock: What I meant by that is that he finds it rather funny that I answer the phone in that manner when I am home.

If you weren’t so hung up on grammar you might be able to enjoy these post more. Some of us are not in the mind set that this is English class and everything has to be just perfect to make one person happy. *wink*

Dish of semi-skimmed for the American lass, Garcon!

meow.

I see. There's no place for misinterpreting posts for potential comedic effect, then. As to imply some sort of deviant sexual fantasy ("get's a kick") about telephone answering.

My apologies. I didn't realise that all posts on here were meant to be taken 100% literally. I must have been the first one on here to have tried to twist a meaning, I guess.

/beats self with a birch rod as penance.

Also I found the idea of someone pronouncing an abbreviated word such as that amusing. I guess that failed to translate across the Atlantic. Maybe if I left some of the letters out/spelled it wrong it would make more sense. Or maybe removed any trace of sarcasm.

Has that beaten the posts to death yet?

*sigh*

I am in the mind set that this is English class and everything has to be just perfect.

thud

I'm sorry, Phil, But I can find no literal meaning in your post, and hence no relevance to the rest of the thread. It was therefore a waste of a good post.

I feel I must chastise you, and turn my nose up in your general direction.

Also, the 'T' in thud should have been capitalised.

Right, where is my ball, it is coming home with me

:P

It's at the driving range getting smacked.

"Bad ball!"

Excuse me, what relevance does that have in this thread, I find that most unnecessary!

Question mark?

Exclamation Mark!

Full stop.

No. Really.

Stop.

Vic, you know inglesh was nver my strong point

Can we please stop pulling everyone up on their english.

Its getting right on my tits.

English.

It's.

Sorry. I'll stop now.

hehe

*snigger*

they're

What? Get a grip Alfie.

I hope you're being comedic (of sorts).

Their on the stair, Right they're?

fuck it..I am off. Cya all sometime.

"I hope you're being comedic (of sorts)."

your

(and yes, I decided that as noone ever learns which they're their there or your yore you're then I would just correct people at random.)

thuD

sploosh

Mr Leghorn hasn't really gone, has he?

We won't know until he doesn't come back.

^^ props

foggy: come back so we won't know when it was that you didn't

he has gone :(
you silly pedants.

We might be silly pedants, but I think we all know the real issue here is that you didn't use a capital letter at the start of your sentence, yet could be bothered to put a full stop.

:P

Inverted question mark¿

unfunny

quite
a running joke should encourage participation/posting, not steadily discourage.

Running joke you say?

Arsene Wenger has today completed the signing of his new star player.

On signing the contract Leslie Ash was heard to comment that she was really
looking forward to being unbeaten for nine months.

lol

"a running joke"

I didn't know you'd even entered the marathon Salty

"a running joke should encourage participation/posting, not steadily discourage"

Sorry dad. Who died and made you king?

the queen

God Save Her!

and all who sail in her!!

I heard she was having her bottom cleaned.

"her majesty was admitted to hospital today for a routine procedure to have a barnacle removed. the nhs have promised to treat her like any normal patient and so there are grave fears for her life."

I've worked it out, you are 'comedy terrorist' Aaron Barschak aren't you?

alas i am not so good as he. i am 'failed terrorist' Arnold Barslob. i crashed a 727 into the tallest mountain in the world as it was obviously a deeply offensive symbol of american imperialist arrogance. alas, nobody noticed. not even the passengers. it turns out i'd actually hijacked a 7-7 convenience store, which explains why it took so long and had such trouble achieving any real altitude. i feel such a failure.

in my defence, circling the foothills of everest in a convenience store as it struggles to slowly gain height is not as easy as it sounds. the store responded only sluggishly to the controls and was prone to suddenly running out of change.

hehehe

Don't encourage him.

burp